Anastiaciadom takes over Osborne House

I bet you think that being a reviewer is a cushy number – going to gigs for free, hanging out backstage and exchanging pleasantries with c-list celebrities, drinking the complimentary booze. And you'd be right, most of the time. However for every show that's a pleasure to attend, you get one where it's more of a struggle to complete your assignment.

On paper this seemed like a pleasant way to spend and evening - in the grounds of a stately home, with beer and music. However this being England the weather was against us. For most of the day it had been a cold, drizzly rain, and not the sort of weather you want to stand about in for too long.

Fortunately, as we entered the site the drizzle finally abated. Osborne House was Queen Victoria's summer residence and the arena is set in the venerable monarch's back garden, the house providing a civilized backdrop.

The audience was split into two – literally – as those who wanted to jump about and dance were allowed to the front, while those who wanted to set up chairs and picnics were prevented from going further forward than the sound desk. In theory a good idea, unfortunately because of the numbers attending it meant there was a noticeable gap between the two groups, that deadened the overall atmosphere.

First on stage was Charley MaCaulay, a last minute replacement on the bill for X-Factor finalist Leon Jackson, who cancelled last week, presumably after finding out you couldn't use Pro Tools during a live performance. This, as it turned out, was a blessing as Charley proved herself with a solo perfomance that showed a maturity beyond her 16 years.

Playing an acoustic guitar she opened with her current single 'Superman', then worked her way through original songs and covers, telling the crowd "I've been told not to do covers, but I'm going to sneak a couple in" after playing a Lady Gaga track so forgettable I can't remember the name, she then played a few of her own songs, including 'Funny Five Minutes', written after being told she was playing the event a few days earlier.

She was joined on stage by Matt Shenton playing electric guitar for the final three songs, which included one of the best covers of Guns'n'Roses 'Sweet Child of Mine' I've heard. Refusing to leave the stage when she was supposed to she stayed for a one extra song, a laid back and mellow reworking of the Foo Fighter's 'Best of You'. Despite the short set Charley very quickly got the crowd on side and deserved the cheers and applause she got as she walked off stage – definitely worth seeing if she comes round your way.

Next on stage was Escala, providing a change of, well, just about everything really. For those of you who haven't heard of them before, they are an electric string quartet who made their name after reaching the finals of Britain's Got Talent in 2008. Playing a mixture of classical and pop, they have an energy on stage that goes against the traditional image of a classical quartet and certainly had the crowds attention, although I suspect for half the crowd this was improved by the short dresses and incredibly long legs on display.

It would be easy to write them off as eye candy were it not for the fact that they are genuinely talented musicians too, and they attack the songs with gusto and an obvious love of the material they are playing, whether it's 'Adagio for Strings' or Led Zepplin's 'Kashmir'. By the time they had left the stage, the clouds had also departed the skies, giving us the final few minutes of a beautiful sunset.

Having heard a good review thus far, you must be wondering why this review was such a chore. To answer you in a single word:

Anastiaciadom.

Now I've always been a bit ambivalent about Anastacia's music when it came on the radio, but I have now discovered there are two reasons that it didn't bother me: Firstly I could switch it off; and secondly I didn't have to listen to her mini homilies or declarations of love for her fellow diva’s - all the time. From her arrival on stage she declared that we are all now residents of 'Anastaciadom'; described the Isle of Wight as a "like, tiny, awesome place"; repeatedly introduced her backing singers; and brought on 'Tom' and 'Jay' who were "eye candy for the girls", everything she did just seemed to irritate me intensely.

The music wasn't much better either. As I said earlier, I've always found it to be fairly inoffensive pop, however, robbed of post production the shortcomings in her voice become quite clear, she certainly has a good range, but there is a lack of depth that makes it not much better than the pop-factor wannabies that are desperately trying to emulate her.

In her favour she performs the songs with passion, moves around the stage performing to the audience, and is certainly aware that they are the people who put her where she is, at one point bringing two star-struck fans up on stage to perform with her (to her credit she handled Lucas, a Polishman who's fandom bordered on obsession, very well). However after surviving an hour and a quarter of this I decided I'd seen enough and headed off in search of better things, the small but steady stream of people leaving the arena before me showed that I wasn't alone in my desire to leave the state of 'Anastaciadom' to rule itself as it saw fit.

Latest Updates