remarkable failure of a finale leaves Standon Calling stormed off

Well. That could both be an exclamation, or a descriptor of the festival site at the end of Standon Calling. The thunder arrived, the heavens opened, then the festival shut off the music and issued safety warnings until it slowly sank. Early on Monday evening the festival issued a statement, with all of the first four paragraphs eulogising the weekend, and the only reference to its early closure in the entire first page being the opening line “What a groundbreaking and thoroughly joyous 3.5 days”. More than a little cheeky considering that many would barely consider their Thursday offerings even half a festival day. 

Let’s go back to the start. There are a huge number of difficulties in putting on a festival in 2021, COVID and the restrictions around it have defined the last 18 months of our lives, understandably denying us the joys of live music and festival crowds. Standon Calling committed to going ahead when the government postponed restrictions until 19th July, just 3 days before the start of the festival. They put on, in their words: “the first full-capacity outdoor festival to take place outside of the Government’s Event Research Programme.” The strict requirements of requiring everyone attending to take a (paid) video-verified COVID test in the 2 days before arriving added extra stress to the preparation, but early on, it certainly seemed to pay off. The festival felt in full flow, packed with happy crowds enjoying a huge range of entertainment. For a glorious period, social distancing, masks, and general concerns about spreading and catching a disease could be forgotten, everyone’s only focus became making most of the freedom to enjoy as much as humanly possible. 

Our weekend at Standon Calling didn’t get off to a great start, stewards and security were woefully uninformed. It’s understandable that the staff shortages across the hospitality industry and casual employment have hurt the availability and standards of stewards, but the inability to provide basic directions was a huge negative. A combination of repeated misdirection from unsure staff, and the campsite being the hardest ground I’ve ever pitched a tent in, meant a 6pm arrival turned into not experiencing the festival properly until 4 hours after parking up. Sufficient time to catch the underwhelming Bastille (ReOrchestrated), which felt much more like a pop band desperately trying to refresh their sound with a gimmick than anything particularly exciting or revelatory.

Still, the various late night offerings were refreshing, acrobatics, a fire show, DJs, and Elvana (Elvis fronted Nirvana) all proving that you don’t need to be original to still provide impressive entertainment. 

We started Saturday with the obligatory bimble, wandering past yoga and survival workshops, juggling performances, hot tubs, and dog shows, with a vast array of statues, signs, and locales placed with the festival’s “Time Turbulence” theme. We went nosing at line-ups, catching The Big Moon, who brought not just their typical excellence and passion, but an atmosphere of pent-up joy at being back performing. 

Deciding what to do proved difficult, there were quite a few last minute line-up changes, which were barely advertised outside the festival’s phone app. No printed programme was available to purchase, one of a number of modernisation attempts, along with cashless wristbands as the compulsory method to shop with. 

Our meandering took us past Mae Muller at the main stage, we hadn't planned to see her set as we were heading towards The Lawn at the time, but her strong stage presence quickly captured us, with her powerful vocal performance bringing together a jazzy sexy voice with lyrics full of strong themes of female empowerment. Judging by how varied the ages in the audience were, this was an impressive introduction to win over those unfamiliar with her music. Definitely a great choice for a boutique festival flirting with the mainstream like Standon is. The energy she brought to the stage and her strong presence did not just derail us from our initial plans of watching comedy; but literally stopped us in our tracks.

We got to the comedy to see Owen Roberts introducing Eshaan Akbar, whose aggressive comedy was the stand-out performance amidst a day of excellent speakers and entertainers over on the Lawn, the tent that was home to anything: environmental talks, comedy, more music acts, and naughty bingo. All excellent entertainment while lazing in or out of the sun with a beer and a bite. 

Food and drink prices at festivals have been rising in recent years, but £6/pint always feels like a fairly obnoxious level. This frustration is amplified by inconsistent bar prices, with some charging £6.50 for any choice. The brazen differences and inconsistencies amplify an already high price point, and Brewdog being the only brand of beer on offer feels painful, particularly after recent reports of bullying and harassment. The range of food was much better though, with the general trend of improved availability of varied, quality options catering to plenty of dietary requirements being amply met. 

Hot Chip headlined on Saturday, and delighted the bouncing crowd with their magnificent alt-house. Grafting together styles from across all ages of electronica, they teased and baited the audience with soars and perfectly delivering drops, before welcoming on Jarvis Cocker twice to add even more star power to their stunning set.

Saturday night found us rushing to catch the Elder Island set scheduled for around midnight at the second stage Laundry Meadows. Despite their rising reputation and high billing, crowds were late to gather and the vast majority scattered to other smaller tents for an opportunity to have a boogey or even go back to their tents. We definitely can’t fault the band for that, as their stunning performance lived up to our already high expectations. One criticism we would make though was whether the band would have benefited from different slot more suited to their magnificently crafted electro-pop soundscapes and haunting vocals, instead of going on at peak party time.  

Standon used lighting very cleverly to transform the site at night into a wonderland of visual stimuli. Starved of fairy lights and clever light shows for as long as we have been, the colours and sounds of the night woke up our night time instincts and sent us out searching for more. There were several late night tents dotted around with DJ sets until the early morning, but The Cowshed and Groove Garden were packed to capacity, so we ended our night at The Magic Teapot, which had a delightfully whimsical sense to it, with live jazz piano covers of classic hits while people sat singing along with tea and booze alike. 

Sunday's hangover didn't deter us from exploring the festival, after packing our tent for a planned quick exit after Primal Scream, we started down the time travel adventure on offer, which started off delightfully intriguing, yet with the 2nd clue on our haunt being excessively vague, we gave up and returned to watch another DJ set by the excellent Ronnie Joice before lingering around the main stage in anticipation of an exciting finale.

Excluding the headliners, the main stage was at its busiest for Jake Bugg’s set, but his performance really lacked expression. Unlike most of the other performers over the weekend, he seemed more relieved than excited to be back on stage, with his most emotive moment being as he was called off for the storm as he started the riffs to Lightning Bolt. His angry frustration at his set being cut short was shared across Standon Calling, with everyone disappointed but initially forgiving of the failure to continue.

And so to the crux of it. It’s completely understandable that a festival cuts live performances during a thunderstorm. Having people standing on or near metal structures with electric equipment turned on during a lightning storm is dangerous, and the right call was made to issue safety warnings and cancel the immediate acts. What is less forgiveable though, is the complete inability to resume after the storm dies down to mere rain. Regardless of excuses, any festival in the UK should ensure that their site is safe for punters through wet weather. Forecasts, straw, sunken ground support and covers are all readily available to modern festivals, and should be considered preferable to having to send people home through massive and unwieldy traffic queues, with those unfortunate enough to be camping on the Sunday staying in potentially dangerous conditions.

Am I glad I went to Standon Calling? Absolutely, it’s nearly 2 years since my last festival outing, and I had a day and a half of feeling the pent up energy of thousands of people reclaiming their summer. I could feel the joy and relief from nearly everyone there, punters, bands, and staff alike delighted to return. Unfortunately, the abrupt end defined the weekend. The official line is as follows:
“The cruel nature of the final few hours of a glorious weekend is hard to comprehend. We understand the disappointment, but no amount of rain can dampen our spirits, no thunderstorm can cast a shadow over the triumphant feeling felt across the weekend and the euphoria of being back together again.”
This might be intended to read pleasantly, but such a monumental failure reflects incredibly badly upon Standon Calling, and such waffle feels disrespectful to everyone who attended. The fact they’re part-owned by Broadwick who were responsible for the Y-Not fiasco back in 2017 only perpetuates the anger many will justifiably feel, and the paltry refund offering to Sunday day ticket holders who contact them is embarrassingly greedy and mediocre:
“We understand this is particularly disappointing for those of you who had Sunday Day tickets and arrived at the same time as the storm. Please contact us at info@standon-calling.com with the subject line “SC21 Sunday Ticket Options” + the lead ticket holders full name’ if you wish to understand your ticket options. Please also provide the lead bookers email address and the ticket agent you purchased from.”

Ultimately, everyone has a different thing that makes a festival stand out for them. Standon Calling managed to bring together everything a festival offers beyond the music: a range of activities and entertainment for children; other arts such as spoken word, comedy, and workshops; delicious but overpriced food and drink; late-night performances and DJs for those partying into the early hours, and to top it all off, a healthy dose of corporate failings and bullshit.

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