Don't EVER let your kids have sleepovers!
Carnage! Total anarchy from start to finish, our daughter was alreadt tired (and so were we) from waking up at crack of dawn to see if her presents were about. Then waking us up to ask if she can open them. After a debauched weekend at Endorse-It my eyelids were still plastered shut and my brain wouldn work - so i was knackered anyway.
Present opening followed and then ensued hours of setting up her bleedin' laptop for her, and having to move the wireless router cos it wouldn't see it. Finally done and what happens one of the gouramis decides to pop her clogs and one of the neon rainbowfish has exploded on side of gills! Terrific! Quick burail of the gourami - you're not supposed to flush them down the loo as they carry tropical diseases and with our warm waters these days could spark an outbreak of some amazonian lurgey.
Next up buying decorations and a mountain of junk food, then putting up decorations. Kids have no bleedin' idea on tasteful decoration and even less about room layouts - much chaos and gnashing of teeth as balloons were put in doorways etc.
Then we collected the little darlings, got stuck in a traffic jam and arrived late for 10 pin bowling. Two games, four kids - three, THREE hours! I had a review of Endorse-It to do for chrissakes! junk food meal - and all the other kids use 4-6 sachets of tomato sauce on a plate under 4 inches across of fries! WTF! Plus constantly buy sweets! But only drink water cos it's good for them???!!! Mind you food and drinks (guinness for me) for all six of us came to £18 bargain!
Went out for a fag. The whole place is no smoking! and watched 14 year olds pissed out of their brains on cider fall over in the road or defy gravity and remain upright at dizzying angles while trying to get off with each other.
Came home, left them in living room, to eat more snacks, play games and bitch at each other. where i became a waiter pandering to their bleedin' wants for hours, until finally I miss Lost and get them to get ready for bed. Stick on Nanny McPhee and they settle down. I type like a nutter (sorry Neil or Speedyscott as it probably needs to be re-written) the Endorse It reviews, going off notes i clearly wrote while totally out of it on stuff.
Finish about 12.30 and decide to go to bed, downstairs the little darlings (of be-elzebub!) make a bleedin' racket all night! They stay up all bleedin' night! Making more noise than a 17 year old punk on speed and 5 gallons of cider! I can't sleep and prefer to stay awake as i know as soon as i fall asleep there would be a disaster and I'd only have to wake up. K sleeps throughout all of it! I need to buy ear plugs!
So now I have a mouintain of work to do and I'm knackered! I'm supposed to be seeing William tonight but have no idea whether he's read my message or whether I'll even make the pub! Footies on tonight too and I'm also supposed to be out for that!
anyway back to the grindstone and another small lake of coffee! But if you have kids don't let them talk you into letting them have a sleepover - not unless you go away for the night!
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