If you think this translates to seeing big dance acts live, you clearly didn't see the tiny crowd Disclosure pulled on Saturday night, it barely reached the screens on the Other Stage. Ironically, the points you're making count against Fred because the people you're talking about invariably leave the headliners early to make sure they can get into West Hayes or SE Corner.
Stormzy was already a celebrity, coming off one of the biggest selling albums of the year, and his headlining represented a big first for the festival. None of this applies to Fred Again. I'm not saying pulling a big crowd at the Other Stage isn't impressive, even if it is up against Royal Blood, but Bloc Party and Avril pulled huge crowds this year and no one's hankering for them to headline.
Ultimately, you have to look at who the festival books as their headliners these days: big mainstream acts with huge sing-a-long hits and/or stage shows. That even applies to Lizzo and SZA, who people seem to think aren't big enough and chosen at least partially for diversity reasons, but who are both bigger than Fred on virtually every metric - album sales, hit singles, streaming numbers, venue sizes, mainstream recognition, you name it. SZA played four shows at the O2, twice the size of Ally Pally, last year and it didn't make a difference.
Emily Eavis has also been vocal about wanting to increase diversity at the top of the bill. Could I see Glastonbury making an exception for someone like Sam Fender, a magnetic artist with a huge, young, vaguely parasocial fanbase, a history of activism, two big number one albums and at least two huge anthems, whose last two UK shows were in a stadium? Yes. What are the chances they'd do the same with Fred Again, someone with no big albums, no mainstream presence for the viewers at home, almost no sing-a-long tunes and no big live rep, who's going to need a succession of largely unkown singers to come up for each song? I already know the answer, and it isn't 10%, 5%, 1% or even 0.1% - it's zero. ZERO PERCENT. And that's true whether your inside tip was from the owner of eFestivals, Mystic Meg or Emily Eavis herself.
Does this mean Fred couldn't do well near the top of the bill? I think he probably would do pretty well, but it's a vast jump from there to headliner and he doesn't fit for all the reasons above. Unless he releases some huge crossover songs I wouldn't even expect him to headline ahead of Harry Styles in three years' time. Some of you seem to be personally invested in this but it just ain't happening next year.
