gratedenini Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 (edited) To put anyone who is in misery,out of it--and maybe put those who aren`t in misery--in it.... I hereby declare that I, The Grate Denini 3rd Earl of Harte le Pool shall be attending the festival of Wychwood 2008. I shall be in attendace with my beautiful wife Silke Birgitt and sons Jordan and King Larmer Dalyon of Glienicke & Nordbahn* although I understand a ticket has to be secured for the latter. I ask of thee for attendance at the site of our aged van, Meet The Fockers which can be espied by means of a geet big orange man flying high over Clevedon Hill. Although the bringing of vittals would be a gesture of great kindness and respect, if any were to come empty handed or without materials, fear not for the The Earls Bag shall be fulleth. And ,in a victorious salute of perseverance, I bring before your very eyes, the technological breakthrough which has been so lacking.... pictures of piggin tickets! I shall be serving, probably on Sunday afternoon around the 4pm mark Kaffee und Kuchen (coffee and cake) which is traditional for the people of Krautistan to take--- my wife being a native of said land. Accompanying this will be my special Northern Pimms, which has took many a fookin southerns knapper off as unlike the Southern version--this one actually includes alcohol. Fresh fruits of the season will make this a merry little sojourn I`m sure and for the smokers amongst you, there shall be a little bus-shelter type set up behind the van which should accomadate all comers (keep away from the bairns like). So, there you have it... no tickets required, but notice please as our lass might be having a pregnancy nap. Who`s in? Den, once a Twig,ALWAYS a Twig. * the bairns are gorgeous too mind Edited May 20, 2008 by gratedenini Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr blue Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 mr and ms blue thank the 3rd earl for his kind invitaion and confirm they will be in attendance at his soiree. Providing there's nothing else on at the time. Like a festival or something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jollynolly Posted May 21, 2008 Report Share Posted May 21, 2008 I have no idea what your on about. But thanks. Sunday it is then xxxxxxxxxxxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porkybrushcut Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 To put anyone who is in misery,out of it--and maybe put those who aren`t in misery--in it.... I hereby declare that I, The Grate Denini 3rd Earl of Harte le Pool shall be attending the festival of Wychwood 2008. I shall be in attendace with my beautiful wife Silke Birgitt and sons Jordan and King Larmer Dalyon of Glienicke & Nordbahn* although I understand a ticket has to be secured for the latter. I ask of thee for attendance at the site of our aged van, Meet The Fockers which can be espied by means of a geet big orange man flying high over Clevedon Hill. Although the bringing of vittals would be a gesture of great kindness and respect, if any were to come empty handed or without materials, fear not for the The Earls Bag shall be fulleth. And ,in a victorious salute of perseverance, I bring before your very eyes, the technological breakthrough which has been so lacking.... pictures of piggin tickets! I shall be serving, probably on Sunday afternoon around the 4pm mark Kaffee und Kuchen (coffee and cake) which is traditional for the people of Krautistan to take--- my wife being a native of said land. Accompanying this will be my special Northern Pimms, which has took many a fookin southerns knapper off as unlike the Southern version--this one actually includes alcohol. Fresh fruits of the season will make this a merry little sojourn I`m sure and for the smokers amongst you, there shall be a little bus-shelter type set up behind the van which should accomadate all comers (keep away from the bairns like). So, there you have it... no tickets required, but notice please as our lass might be having a pregnancy nap. Who`s in? Den, once a Twig,ALWAYS a Twig. * the bairns are gorgeous too mind Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gratedenini Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 i being of unsound body and mind, the lardarse of manfield of dreams, the fourth duke of earl and king of all i see(not alot really) SIR PORKY and my trusty manservant king ARTHUR of sutton in ashfield will try and espy your magnificent encampment, and wish to share our victuals and ales and stuff with you kind sir.....fare thee well and see you sooneth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr blue Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 You tell im Den. Presumptuous oik, accepting an invite meant for another! What are things coming too? It was never like this in my day. I bet he's one of those hoodies I read so much about in the Daily Mail. Probably nick your hubcaps too. C'mon Porky, where's your qualification? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jollynolly Posted May 23, 2008 Report Share Posted May 23, 2008 I want to be a twig. Unfortuately I am more of a bush but don't let that bother anyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porkybrushcut Posted May 23, 2008 Report Share Posted May 23, 2008 You tell im Den. Presumptuous oik, accepting an invite meant for another! What are things coming too? It was never like this in my day. I bet he's one of those hoodies I read so much about in the Daily Mail. Probably nick your hubcaps too. C'mon Porky, where's your qualification? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fubab Posted May 25, 2008 Report Share Posted May 25, 2008 kind sirs!, please forgiveth my presumptiousness, we did not mean to cause umbridge amongst the clan of the twig, but merely wished to cement relations and extend cordial greetings (and perhaps have a sup of yer beer)...also to per appen to indulge in some mutual threttling (our threttling sticks still conform to the european standard and have previously been endorsed by the hattie jaques institute and marston brewery)...or we could indulge in a couple of rounds of consensual nob lobbing(our version is played with 2 ponies and a small baton called a curmudgeon)....two manly sports particular to our locale and designed to engender good relations between war torn northern communities up here in the ..er , north. i can assure mr blue that the king and i are not hoodies ( unless, as we are from nottingham we are labelled 'robbin hoodies'...groaneth) and have no interest in these 'hub caps' of which you speak(unless of course they would fit a vauxhall astra estate)...in fact our usual mode of transport is a stretcher. enough of this mediocrity , you wish to know of our qualifications?...well king arthur is a black belt in the art of lurking and once appeared on the jeremy kyle show as chief protagonist in an ongoing court case in which he may well lose his lurking licence.He once studied under the radical dr alison moyet at liverpool polytechnic and despite losing his marbles at a hawkwind gig in 1972 , achieved a worthless diploma, he also wrote the seminal work 'lurking from a distance' with a foreward by paul morley. i, on the other hand have several awards for festering in a darkened room , one of which was presented to me by the late harry corbett(peace be upon him) ...i also hold the record for freestyle outdoor badger jumping and came second in the mansfield and district pam ayers pussy shoving championship in 2007, oh and whilst on the subject of blowin ones own trumpet i can lardle one handed whilst quoting the wickes 1998 product catalogue (in latin). so gentlemen ,we humbly apologise if you do not wish our presence, and will probably go off and heckle the lady kate of rusby and request she 'pops one out for the lads'......fare thee well then , advocates of the gazebo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no smoke without fire Posted May 25, 2008 Report Share Posted May 25, 2008 (edited) Edited May 27, 2008 by howiewind Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no smoke without fire Posted May 25, 2008 Report Share Posted May 25, 2008 (edited) I want to be a twig. Unfortuately I am more of a bush but don't let that bother anyone. Edited May 27, 2008 by howiewind Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Medina Posted May 26, 2008 Report Share Posted May 26, 2008 Too many weekends camping among the cow pats and horse dung appear to have addled some brains. As well as camping areas for 'quiet' and 'noisy' people, can Mr. Wychwood please arrange one for 'slightly strange persons who should be given a wide berth by the rest of us'? Even if they are offering coffee and cake Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shooting star Posted May 26, 2008 Report Share Posted May 26, 2008 kind sirs!, please forgiveth my presumptiousness, we did not mean to cause umbridge amongst the clan of the twig, but merely wished to cement relations and extend cordial greetings (and perhaps have a sup of yer beer)...also to per appen to indulge in some mutual threttling (our threttling sticks still conform to the european standard and have previously been endorsed by the hattie jaques institute and marston brewery)...or we could indulge in a couple of rounds of consensual nob lobbing(our version is played with 2 ponies and a small baton called a curmudgeon)....two manly sports particular to our locale and designed to engender good relations between war torn northern communities up here in the ..er , north. i can assure mr blue that the king and i are not hoodies ( unless, as we are from nottingham we are labelled 'robbin hoodies'...groaneth) and have no interest in these 'hub caps' of which you speak(unless of course they would fit a vauxhall astra estate)...in fact our usual mode of transport is a stretcher. enough of this mediocrity , you wish to know of our qualifications?...well king arthur is a black belt in the art of lurking and once appeared on the jeremy kyle show as chief protagonist in an ongoing court case in which he may well lose his lurking licence.He once studied under the radical dr alison moyet at liverpool polytechnic and despite losing his marbles at a hawkwind gig in 1972 , achieved a worthless diploma, he also wrote the seminal work 'lurking from a distance' with a foreward by paul morley. i, on the other hand have several awards for festering in a darkened room , one of which was presented to me by the late harry corbett(peace be upon him) ...i also hold the record for freestyle outdoor badger jumping and came second in the mansfield and district pam ayers pussy shoving championship in 2007, oh and whilst on the subject of blowin ones own trumpet i can lardle one handed whilst quoting the wickes 1998 product catalogue (in latin). so gentlemen ,we humbly apologise if you do not wish our presence, and will probably go off and heckle the lady kate of rusby and request she 'pops one out for the lads'......fare thee well then , advocates of the gazebo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porkybrushcut Posted May 27, 2008 Report Share Posted May 27, 2008 Well I lost my marbles a few years later...AND YOU SHOULDN'T DO THAT ! I have to say that you sadly seem stuck on a teenage Stacia fantasy !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porkybrushcut Posted May 27, 2008 Report Share Posted May 27, 2008 Dearest Porkupine, Oh what noble words, wow. The Real Shooting Star Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shugie Posted May 28, 2008 Report Share Posted May 28, 2008 Cake? Cake? Did someone offer cake at 4pm Sunday? Excellent, I shall attend with small daughter who quite likes cake really. Any cake. If I can hide a small offering from her until then, I shall bring that along with me. It might be cake. Or perhaps biscuits. Custard cream anyone? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porkybrushcut Posted May 28, 2008 Report Share Posted May 28, 2008 Cake? Cake? Did someone offer cake at 4pm Sunday? Excellent, I shall attend with small daughter who quite likes cake really. Any cake. If I can hide a small offering from her until then, I shall bring that along with me. It might be cake. Or perhaps biscuits. Custard cream anyone? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gratedenini Posted May 28, 2008 Report Share Posted May 28, 2008 HOB NOBS ARE FAVOURED...ALTHOUGH A CREAM HORN WOULD BE NICE. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jollynolly Posted May 29, 2008 Report Share Posted May 29, 2008 Rubarb and custard vodka? If its not drunk by then Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gratedenini Posted May 29, 2008 Report Share Posted May 29, 2008 Rubarb and custard vodka? If its not drunk by then Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jollynolly Posted May 29, 2008 Report Share Posted May 29, 2008 Nah, you crush S and M, or M and S rhubarb and custard sweeties and place them at the bottom of a bottle then pour vodka on top stopping once in a while to give the bottle a gentle shake. Hey presto sexy magic! And rhubarb and custard vodka. You can make it with any kind of boiled sweets Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gratedenini Posted May 29, 2008 Report Share Posted May 29, 2008 Nah, you crush S and M, or M and S rhubarb and custard sweeties and place them at the bottom of a bottle then pour vodka on top stopping once in a while to give the bottle a gentle shake. Hey presto sexy magic! And rhubarb and custard vodka. You can make it with any kind of boiled sweets Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jollynolly Posted May 29, 2008 Report Share Posted May 29, 2008 (edited) You can drink it neat if you like, (Mr Hardcore) Or dilute it with a little lemonade or cream soda. I shall bring you some xxx special like Edited May 29, 2008 by jollynolly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gratedenini Posted May 29, 2008 Report Share Posted May 29, 2008 You can drink it neat if you like, (Mr Hardcore) Or dilute it with a little lemonade or cream soda. I shall bring you some xxx special like Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shugie Posted June 2, 2008 Report Share Posted June 2, 2008 Sorry not to meet up with you, I'd forgotten to take a printout of the picture of your MTF wagon, so didn't know where to find you, although having seen the picture once I got back, I do wonder if you parked up just by the entrance to the campervan fields. Hope you had a good festival though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.