Where do all the cowpats go?

[redmosquito]

I thought the cow pats all went ti live in second homes in Westminster and fill in for all those other turds when they take their 51 weeks a year of holiday.

[Fubsy]

It's a little known fact that the farm is actually as flat as a pancake. if you go out of festival time, there's no hill of death, no trudge upwards to the stone circle, it's one of nature's strangest phenomena, an absolutely flat expanse of farmland in the vale of Avalon.

Unfortunately, it was felt to be unsuitable for a mystical gathering such as Glastonbury, and meant that originally the whole site was more reminiscent of Knebworth bowl than the venue for a ramshackle, marvellous, choatic pop festival. In 1977, some of the countries top landscape gardeners were brought in secret to Worthy farm, there, around the kitchen table and with the help of countless glasses of farm milk, they hatched a plan. All of the cowpats were to be collected every year, and in the run up to the festival used to redesign the land, with hills, bumps, contours and the like. The hill of death alone requires the redistribution of 17 thousand tonnes of turds.

Until now, this plan has been top secret, and by speaking out, I've broken the code of omerde that binds us all together. This, i fear, may be my final posting, I believe they're already tracking me down, and as I type, I can hear furious landscapers, armed with rakes, battering at my door. Farewell, good festival goers....

[mandypants]

I happen to know that these guys are regularly called in to help out the odd cow that has overstepped his mark and got into a tricky upstairs situation at Worth Farm . . .

http://www.hyperactive-stage.co.uk/bovined...ders/about.html

[Funkfarley]

and the winner is...

Unusual question!

For the last couple of years the cows have not gone out to grass before the Festival. They are still in their winter quarters at present, while around in the area all other herds are out, so likely to be the same this year. One of the license conditions is that there are no animals on the land for a month before the Festival, and that all fields are to be harrowed by that time too, if they are let out. Not letting them out avoids having to harrow, and all the fields can be cut for silage (feed for next winter).

As the Farm was in such a state after the Festival in 2007, the cows stayed in all year.

[karlpowell]

I smoked them all last year , also they make a good emergency umbrella

[ShadyBlueBell]

Ladies and gentlemen, as a result of a Glasto virgin question on the /index.php?showtopic=119547">other board, a mysterious point has come up - if Worthy Farm is a dairy farm for 9 months of the year, where do all the cowpats go? Are they washed away by the incessant West Country rain, or is something more sinister going on? Is the site in fact a secret weapons base used by Scouting for Girls to develop their lyrics, or worse? Maybe Jacqui Smith has a fourth home there?! I think we should be told!

[Sweep]

Surreal debate of the day: Are cows able to walk up stairs to get to toilets?

I love this place!!

[ramragon]

Cows can walk up stairs but not down.

...true fact, honest.

Edited April 30, 2009 by ramragon

[Sweep]

question,

if a cow walked backwards downstairs would it manage to reach the bottom, as surely this in principal is the same movement of the legs as walking up stairs in the first place !

[ramragon]

Interesting question. Although the movement of legs is relatively similar, there is a strong distinction between the use of the muscles in either process. Is it physically possible? There is a small possibility. But what is clear is that a cow is unlikely to ever consider such a process, or execute it without falling over.

[joshwarrr]

question,

if a cow walked backwards downstairs would it manage to reach the bottom, as surely this in principal is the same movement of the legs as walking up stairs in the first place !

[Funkfarley]

ok.

So the fact I got us all the right answer isn't good enough....we are still debating the upstairs, downstairs ability od cows!?

lol...I love you guys!

[joshwarrr]

ok.

So the fact I got us all the right answer isn't good enough....we are still debating the upstairs, downstairs ability od cows!?

lol...I love you guys!

[where be that blackbird]

Have you guys not seen the Massey Ferguson "service monorail unit" going round?

granted they dont go round the track as often as the regular services but they can still be seen early morning and late evening pumping the loos and transporting offending pats... crewed by the brown police no less.

mystery solved.

[Funkfarley]

i didnt even realise you had answered the question. i must have blanked the none silly answers from my mind.