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Guest guypjfreak

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I was thinking of management doublespeak just now, being a big George Orwell fan. Anyone got any examples?

My offerings:

Everything OK over here?

You don't have time to say good morning to each other, get on with your work.

Please manage your breaks effectively

You don't have time for a pee, get on with your work.

We'll do all we can to help you back to work

you don't have time to be sick, get back in and get on with your work.

You're hotdesking today.

We didn't have time to tell you we'd moved you, so ignore that person sitting in your desk and hurry up and find an empty one.

And get on with your work.

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I was thinking of management doublespeak just now, being a big George Orwell fan. Anyone got any examples?

My offerings:

Everything OK over here?

You don't have time to say good morning to each other, get on with your work.

Please manage your breaks effectively

You don't have time for a pee, get on with your work.

We'll do all we can to help you back to work

you don't have time to be sick, get back in and get on with your work.

You're hotdesking today.

We didn't have time to tell you we'd moved you, so ignore that person sitting in your desk and hurry up and find an empty one.

And get on with your work.

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One thing that got me at work was how they introduced the call centre concept (within a charitable housing organisation - purportedly). They got consultants in that concluded that most customers wanted to access our wares via the phone. Woopey fucking do, well there's a surprise. What these customers weren't asked was if they wanted a shitty call centre to deal with, rather than dealing with the person involved directly, as had been the previous case. The shit they reign down on those who are in the call centre is abhorent also. I just see evil when I think of some c**t who thought shitting on other people was the way forward.

Edited by feral chile
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dont get a VW old son there to small and shit as well .get a Bedford ...best old campers on the rd

VW's hold or increase their value. Anything else you'll lose money on.

The T25/T3's and older are no wider than the average car, meaning that you can safely park them in narrow streets where wider vans would get constantly bumped and scraped.

Unless you plan spending oodles of time in the van - which you don't at a fest - then the likes of a VW is more than ample for space.

But horses for courses, I guess.

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