Robin Williams.

[5co77ie]

I quite like the fact this has been a success:

https://www.change.org/petitions/activision-blizzard-create-an-npc-within-world-of-warcraft-to-memorialize-the-late-robin-williams-an-avid-world-of-warcraft-player-and-one-of-the-funniest-men-alive#share

[jump]

I quite like the fact this has been a success:

https://www.change.org/petitions/activision-blizzard-create-an-npc-within-world-of-warcraft-to-memorialize-the-late-robin-williams-an-avid-world-of-warcraft-player-and-one-of-the-funniest-men-alive#share

They are trying to do something similar with the Zelda games too, he was huge fan of them and even named his kid Zelda and would appear in Nintendo ads and presentations.

[zero000]

Well isnt Alan Brazil a dick.............?

http://youtu.be/YqgLwDRdfvw

What a c**t. Brian Moore is actually the voice of reason!

[Ruwise]

What a c**t. Brian Moore is actually the voice of reason!

Hear hear. I absolutely hate this attitude. My father commit suicide when I was 16 years old and I can say as the voice of experience that if Alan Brazil is so concerned about Robin Williams children he would shut the fuck up. The absolute worst thing about having a relative die in this way is the pious judgement of dickheads like him. Each time they say things like this they are actually saying I can't believe he didn't love you enough to stick around for you.

I'm very lucky as about a year before my father died a family friend's relative commit suicide and my father said some of these things himself. He couldn't believe someone could do that to their kids so I know my father wasn't in his right mind when he died. I actually believe my father got so angry about it because he had probably talked himself out it many times before for the sake of his children.

Even if you don't understand depression well enough and do have this attitude please tell me what does voicing it do for anybody. The person who you believe to be a coward is dead. They won't hear what you are saying. The only people who will hear are already suffering enough already. I've never heard somebody say about somebody who dies of a heart attack or a cancer that is known to be caused by lifestyle factors if only they cared about their family enough to have a better diet and regular exercise. You just wouldn't because it goes against basic compassion. Just because you don't understand something doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

[TheGayTent]

Can't add anything other than well said.

[russycarps]

I think part of the problem with thick people's attitude towards depression is the name of the illness. If it had a technical medical sounding name then people would not question it and would be as sympathetic as they are towards any other illness.

The fact being depressed also means just being "a bit fed up" leads to this kind of horrible attitude.

Never forget: the majority people are thick as shit. It's not their fault.

Edited August 15, 2014 by russycarps

[lost]

I'm very lucky as about a year before my father died a family friend's relative commit suicide and my father said some of these things himself. He couldn't believe someone could do that to their kids so I know my father wasn't in his right mind when he died.

If its any consolation I can say my own experiences point that way. My mother attempted suicide but luckily some passes by spotted her out cold. The police were called and she was taken to hospital to have stomach pumped. In the months running up to it she had tried to have me arrested for drug dealing because she'd gone through my bank statements and found a transaction that she couldn't work out what it was and then afterwards spent 18 months in a mental hospital needing amongst other things 12 sessions of electroshock therapy.

Very shitty for it to happen during your formative years though as I found out.

[Ruwise]

Sorry to hear that. There were no real signs with my Dad. Nobody saw it coming. He had no obvious signs that people talk about.

[Spindles]

If nothing else, this has brought the subject of depression out into discussion. I've read some great quotes relating to this, including that you aren't depressed ABOUT something, you are depressed. To many RW had so much to live for, so much to be happy about but they have no insight into his inner thoughts, his demons and darkest concerns. Depression is a beast that narrows your view, that stops you from seeing things rationally and to attempt to discuss it and expect a rational reason is a big mistake (in my opinion).

I read this article over the weekend:

http://www.theguardian.com/society/2014/aug/15/suicide-silence-depressed-men

As someone who has tried and failed a few times it struck a chord with me, although perhaps the comment section following the article is more of an interesting read.

[kaosmark2]

I am quite surprised with the mainly positive and sympathetic reaction to the way Robin died in the papers and by people on social media. There is always the odd idiot though who still thinks suicide is a choice/selfish/cowardly and I don't think that will ever change unless everyone experiences what it's like to feel that low

I think suicide is selfish, and I've attempted several times. The main reason it's so long since my last attempt is that it would hurt and upset others. I sympathise strongly with those who feel that low, that desperate, but there IS help out there when needed and it's vital that everyone does as much as possible to throw out the stigma associated with admitting such feelings.

The article above is particularly potent in my mind, as someone who has reached out to people and been told to "suck it up" "get over it" "be a man" "man up" "grow a pair" "stop being such a pussy" and endless such phrases, that's what I most loathe in society. Emotions and the display of emotions being wrong for a man to have is a horrible cultural attitude that modern society needs to stomp into the ground. Archaic attitudes should be buried, not feelings. I'm sure that if I'd been born only 5 years earlier the difference in attitudes means I wouldn't be alive today, and if I'd been born 5 years later I'd have learned to manage things much better much earlier in my life. Progress is being made, but all too slowly.

Hopefully the fact that someone who appeared so full of life resorted to such an act will highlight just how good many sufferers get at hiding their true state, and encourage them not to.

[Spindles]

Indeed, the most common response I've ever had to telling people you suffer from depression is to be told, "no, you don't" and then get a whole talk about how bad their life has been and how they aren't depressed, so why should you be or sometimes that they knew someone who was depressed and they were nothing like me.

The fact that it is so hard to talk to people about, that you are constantly derided or knocked back, treated like a malingerer or pathetic, that's what is making suicide so much more prevalent than it could or should be.

[kaosmark2]

Indeed, the most common response I've ever had to telling people you suffer from depression is to be told, "no, you don't" and then get a whole talk about how bad their life has been and how they aren't depressed, so why should you be or sometimes that they knew someone who was depressed and they were nothing like me.

The fact that it is so hard to talk to people about, that you are constantly derided or knocked back, treated like a malingerer or pathetic, that's what is making suicide so much more prevalent than it could or should be.

Urgh, that one really fucks me off. "If I can deal with this crap, why can't you deal with yours" is such an ignorant response. Utterly thoughtless, callous and self-absorbed.

The thing is, raising the courage to admit something about yourself you've been hiding is a big ask, particularly if you're struggling with every single little bit of day-to-day stuff, and the fact that the majority of the time you do find it and tell someone they act like a twat only makes it harder the next time. People suck.

[kaosmark2]

don't think all suicides are conscious acts.

OK fair enough. I won't disagree with that.

However, that doesn't mean that it can't ever be a selfish act. If you can convince me that I can escape the crap I feel every single day in a way that won't cause harm or upset to anyone I'll go top myself tomorrow. Anyone who CHOOSES to commit suicide is being selfish and is utterly disregarding the importance of the feelings of everyone that cares about them.

[Katster]

Out of interest what exactly is the right thing to say to someone who is depressed? Its almost impossible to say the right thing (in my experience). Whilst i agree the suck it up comments are not ideal, neither really are supportive/understanding comments as they can be viewed as patronising or insincere. I tend to just listen, but its difficult especially when you really massively care about the person who is suffering.

[kaosmark2]

Out of interest what exactly is the right thing to say to someone who is depressed? Its almost impossible to say the right thing (in my experience). Whilst i agree the suck it up comments are not ideal, neither really are supportive/understanding comments as they can be viewed as patronising or insincere. I tend to just listen, but its difficult especially when you really massively care about the person who is suffering.

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Sorry to hear that, let me know whenever you want to talk"

"I know, lets steal a penguin from the zoo!"

It completely depends on the person, but in general, emphasis that you heard it, that you're not judging them for it, and you like their company anyway. "Understanding" comments that are viewed as patronising often carry a tone of judgement. Following that, just show that you're still going to behave in the manner that cemented the friendship in the first place, be it a pub trip, ridiculous jokes, watching films, whatever. Acknowledge and react to what they told you, but from then on treat them exactly as before unless they ask otherwise.

[Katster]

Its not really that simple though, is it?

[Spindles]

That's the problem, really. Depression is such a personal thing, even taking on different forms in the same individual during their lifetime that there is no one shot solution, no right thing to say that would evoke the same response every time.

I find that, from my perspective, people tend to take a defensive attitude when presented with the subject of depression and it is some of the archetypal behaviour and reactions that cause offence/rejection. In my current job it's not something I've discussed with colleagues, keeping my mouth shut when conversations on the subject have come up simply because my experience is that if I do I will face hostility from some, advice that starts with "you should just" from others and disbelief from the rest. I put on a happy mask for the workplace, it's just easier to lie.

[kaosmark2]

That's the problem, really. Depression is such a personal thing, even taking on different forms in the same individual during their lifetime that there is no one shot solution, no right thing to say that would evoke the same response every time.

I find that, from my perspective, people tend to take a defensive attitude when presented with the subject of depression and it is some of the archetypal behaviour and reactions that cause offence/rejection. In my current job it's not something I've discussed with colleagues, keeping my mouth shut when conversations on the subject have come up simply because my experience is that if I do I will face hostility from some, advice that starts with "you should just" from others and disbelief from the rest. I put on a happy mask for the workplace, it's just easier to lie.

Yup. I think the two big things with a response though are not to judge, and not to try and fix it. Offering solutions is well-meaning, but is often the most patronising as it suggests there's an easy route out, which there never is.

I've talked to friends about it, and ultimately, the ones I'm most glad I told are the ones who've just continued treating me the same. Removes the feeling that I'm constantly lying, but hasn't actually changed the dynamic otherwise.

[jump]

I've got a few friends that have got depression & have tried to top themselves off and I have to treat them completely differently.

One I will have to joke about their depression with things like “Well at least you’re taking those happy pills that prevent you from getting an erection when you’re single”, “If you’re gonna throw yourself in front of car again at least make sure it’s something like a tiny clown car or the Batmobile”, “Use the depression as a chat line, PITY SEX!” and this will cheer him up as it’s acknowledging the problem without making it serious. Whilst the other one I have to treat her more delicately and indirectly whilst all the time making sure she doesn’t feel bad about herself for having depression for example if I spot that she has new cuts/burns I can’t directly ask about as it will lead to her bullshitting me so I will have to talk around it and ask how she is doing in general.

[metallimuse]

Was listening to Robin Williams Weapons of Mass Destruction last night,he's gunna be such a big miss.A truely great comedy talent.

[Guest]

OK fair enough. I won't disagree with that.

However, that doesn't mean that it can't ever be a selfish act. If you can convince me that I can escape the crap I feel every single day in a way that won't cause harm or upset to anyone I'll go top myself tomorrow. Anyone who CHOOSES to commit suicide is being selfish and is utterly disregarding the importance of the feelings of everyone that cares about them.

yes, suicide is a selfish act (obviously), but then, so is choosing not to end your life

[The Nal]

Lovely stuff from Letterman.

http://youtu.be/4bVgilYncao

Edited August 19, 2014 by The Nal

[Guest]

Lovely stuff from Letterman.

yes, beautiful.

I can't believe Letterman won't be on any more. I hardly ever get a chance to see him, but just knowing that he IS on, amongst so so much dreck masquerading as chat shows, makes me feel a bit better.

[The Nal]

yes, beautiful.

I can't believe Letterman won't be on any more. I hardly ever get a chance to see him, but just knowing that he IS on, amongst so so much dreck masquerading as chat shows, makes me feel a bit better.

I used to watch him every night when he was on back in the 90s on Super channel or something.

Jimmy Fallon is very good at the moment.

[Guest]

I used to watch him every night when he was on back in the 90s on Super channel or something.

Jimmy Fallon is very good at the moment.

nah... I pretty much can't stand him

no sense of humility, not particularly funny, and too much up himself.

I don't know one 'chat-show' host who is close to bearable. UK or US.