LAWKS! It’s the Next Announcement Thread 2022!

[stuie]

2 minutes ago, Graphic Design Pete said:

I'll fight you.

That's a nice offer anonymous graphic design person, but I will politely decline. 

[Graphic Design Pete]

Just now, stuie said:

That's a nice offer anonymous graphic design person, but I will politely decline. 

Yeah for the best mate. Hope you're well!

[StevieGed]

I saw the Jay Z booking more as a ushering in of a new era for the festival where the variety of who could and should headline was expanding. At that time, and in relation with who the most suitable hip hop act could be globally to fill that top spot, Jay Z was practically the only artist really to fill that void. As mentioned elsewhere, Jay Z is encrypted in hip hop, coming from the late 90s Biggie era and considered by a large majority of hip hop fans one of the greatest to ever do it. The first time having a rapper headline the pyramid, why not do it with the most globally recognised artist within his genre if able too? Dizzie headlining would have been cool, but compare grime in the mid 2000’s compared to now and it’s like two totally different genres of music. 
 

I believe if Wolf Alice were announced to headline the festival it would likely be the most bemused response from the general public in terms of not knowing who they are. As much as I agree the festival should definitely aim to influence acts on the come up and possibly catapult them to bigger things, at the end of the day there still needs to be characteristics of a Glastonbury headliner which equates to them having the credentials to headline.

Kendrick = Pulitzer. GKMC/TPAB hugely critically acclaimed and containing politically charged songs such as Alright.

Macca  = Beatle. No further explanation needed tbh.

Dua = Hits, popular, young British artist in a really prominent position and should only grow if she decides to produce another album with bangers.

Harry = Huge regardless of preferences. Seems to have managed the transition from 1D to credible pop star quite convincingly. 

Billie = Has the youth in a chokehold and has a couple of high charting songs.

Sadly the Wolf Alice’s, George Ezras, Foals etc. Seem to have been around too long to receive the leg up to me, and their only chance to headline now is by getting there on merit alone. These are the acts that I don’t know if a headline slot at Glastonbury now would really improve their career past the next year of headlining the festival with coverage and a bump in sales, unlike a Stormzy in 2019. This isn’t to label any acts bad at all, I just think if an act doesn’t reach high heights early in their career and at least maintain that level, it’s a big ask to get there on the 3rd/4th/5th album if they haven’t already.

Ultimately what I think a lot of us look past is that at the end of the day, Glastonbury is a business that sells tickets, so a sell out or not, their aim is still to attract the biggest acts in the world to the festival to please the ticket holders and ticket tryers. With no T in the Park, V festival and mainly mid tier UK festivals to compete with, Glastonbury is the festival within the UK that has the chance to attract the Maccas, Billies, Kendricks etc. As I can’t think of another UK festival outside of maybe IOW that could lure those acts. The more risks taken to give lower level acts a bump up, the bigger the risk they run of people choosing not to bother to try for tickets, as there is still a large portion of festival goers that are there mainly for the line up. For them, why pay £285 plus all other costs for Glastonbury when the headliners can be found at several other UK festivals? 
 

Sometimes we do all get caught up on this forum and forget about the outside world!

[mattiloy]

12 minutes ago, StevieGed said:

I

Ultimately what I think a lot of us look past is that at the end of the day, Glastonbury is a business that sells tickets, so a sell out or not, their aim is still to attract the biggest acts in the world to the festival to please the ticket holders and ticket tryers. With no T in the Park, V festival and mainly mid tier UK festivals to compete with, Glastonbury is the festival within the UK that has the chance to attract the Maccas, Billies, Kendricks etc. As I can’t think of another UK festival outside of maybe IOW that could lure those acts. The more risks taken to give lower level acts a bump up, the bigger the risk they run of people choosing not to bother to try for tickets, as there is still a large portion of festival goers that are there mainly for the line up. For them, why pay £285 plus all other costs for Glastonbury when the headliners can be found at several other UK festivals? 
 

Sometimes we do all get caught up on this forum and forget about the outside world!

I disagree. Glastonbury is more than just a business and most of the decisions they make across the piste reflect that.

If they wanted to be just a business, they should cut their charitable donations, start with sponsorship, do more tiered ticket pricing for VIPs, replace the secret piano bar with a secret VIP champagne bar where you can only pay in GlastoCoin and on the wall hangs a plaque bearing an NFT for a gif hanging above it depicting Tony benn in his grave revolving at high speed.

In other words, make it more like @Suprefan’s fave - Coachella!

I think that’d be awful and I hope (and believe) that most other attendees are not super turned on by the idea of the commercialisation of the festival.

I think that the lineup on the whole reflects the competing aims of balancing relevance and revenue with values.

But the headliners are the biggies. They are the talking points. And they are what the folks at home will tune in for. And I reckon it’d be nice if Glastonbury took a chance on maybe 1/3 of the acts each year being homegrown, more independent type acts alongside the big hitters. Call it the ’showcase’ slot, which seeks to elevate and promote that kind of act.

[CaledonianGonzo]

Why wouldn't Stormzy or Dua Lipa qualify?

[mattiloy]

3 minutes ago, CaledonianGonzo said:

Why wouldn't Stormzy or Dua Lipa qualify?

They do.

Just think there are better choices to replace Macca than Harry Styles.

And also Dizzee Rascal should have been given it ahead of Jay Z… not that Jay Z should never have headlined, just that why so keen to put a guy on who, whilst admittedly a big star and hip hop icon on the other side of the pond, was at the time comparable in chart performance and notoriety to a homegrown talent, instead of that homegrown talent?

If we always look overseas for our definition of what is a ’big enough’ act, it’ll always be the case that US acts get the nod over UK based ones - its a much bigger market with much bigger global reach.

[Zoo Music Girl]

3 hours ago, gooner1990 said:

I went to that too, I think the timescales all got skewed that night as we turned up for Dizzee and from recollection Franz Ferdinand were on and in my intoxicated state couldn't work out if we'd missed him or not (luckily as it turned out we hadn't!)

This happened to us as well! I think Franz Ferdinand were the surprise act or something?

I'm not even going to the festival this year and the last 20 pages of this thread have been a very entertaining read. About as normal as life has felt in a long time reading all that.

[gfa]

1 hour ago, StevieGed said:

I saw the Jay Z booking more as a ushering in of a new era for the festival where the variety of who could and should headline was expanding. At that time, and in relation with who the most suitable hip hop act could be globally to fill that top spot, Jay Z was practically the only artist really to fill that void. As mentioned elsewhere, Jay Z is encrypted in hip hop, coming from the late 90s Biggie era and considered by a large majority of hip hop fans one of the greatest to ever do it. The first time having a rapper headline the pyramid, why not do it with the most globally recognised artist within his genre if able too? Dizzie headlining would have been cool, but compare grime in the mid 2000’s compared to now and it’s like two totally different genres of music. 
 

I believe if Wolf Alice were announced to headline the festival it would likely be the most bemused response from the general public in terms of not knowing who they are. As much as I agree the festival should definitely aim to influence acts on the come up and possibly catapult them to bigger things, at the end of the day there still needs to be characteristics of a Glastonbury headliner which equates to them having the credentials to headline.

Kendrick = Pulitzer. GKMC/TPAB hugely critically acclaimed and containing politically charged songs such as Alright.

Macca  = Beatle. No further explanation needed tbh.

Dua = Hits, popular, young British artist in a really prominent position and should only grow if she decides to produce another album with bangers.

Harry = Huge regardless of preferences. Seems to have managed the transition from 1D to credible pop star quite convincingly. 

Billie = Has the youth in a chokehold and has a couple of high charting songs.

Sadly the Wolf Alice’s, George Ezras, Foals etc. Seem to have been around too long to receive the leg up to me, and their only chance to headline now is by getting there on merit alone. These are the acts that I don’t know if a headline slot at Glastonbury now would really improve their career past the next year of headlining the festival with coverage and a bump in sales, unlike a Stormzy in 2019. This isn’t to label any acts bad at all, I just think if an act doesn’t reach high heights early in their career and at least maintain that level, it’s a big ask to get there on the 3rd/4th/5th album if they haven’t already.

Ultimately what I think a lot of us look past is that at the end of the day, Glastonbury is a business that sells tickets, so a sell out or not, their aim is still to attract the biggest acts in the world to the festival to please the ticket holders and ticket tryers. With no T in the Park, V festival and mainly mid tier UK festivals to compete with, Glastonbury is the festival within the UK that has the chance to attract the Maccas, Billies, Kendricks etc. As I can’t think of another UK festival outside of maybe IOW that could lure those acts. The more risks taken to give lower level acts a bump up, the bigger the risk they run of people choosing not to bother to try for tickets, as there is still a large portion of festival goers that are there mainly for the line up. For them, why pay £285 plus all other costs for Glastonbury when the headliners can be found at several other UK festivals? 
 

Sometimes we do all get caught up on this forum and forget about the outside world!

George Ezra is quite different to foals and wolf alice - he only has 2 albums and both have been  commercially very well received

Edited February 3, 2022 by gfa

[StevieGed]

55 minutes ago, mattiloy said:

I disagree. Glastonbury is more than just a business and most of the decisions they make across the piste reflect that.

If they wanted to be just a business, they should cut their charitable donations, start with sponsorship, do more tiered ticket pricing for VIPs, replace the secret piano bar with a secret VIP champagne bar where you can only pay in GlastoCoin and on the wall hangs a plaque bearing an NFT for a gif hanging above it depicting Tony benn in his grave revolving at high speed.

In other words, make it more like @Suprefan’s fave - Coachella!

I think that’d be awful and I hope (and believe) that most other attendees are not super turned on by the idea of the commercialisation of the festival.

I think that the lineup on the whole reflects the competing aims of balancing relevance and revenue with values.

But the headliners are the biggies. They are the talking points. And they are what the folks at home will tune in for. And I reckon it’d be nice if Glastonbury took a chance on maybe 1/3 of the acts each year being homegrown, more independent type acts alongside the big hitters. Call it the ’showcase’ slot, which seeks to elevate and promote that kind of act.

Oh it’s definitely more than just a business, no doubting that, the work they do for charities and the general nature/culture of the festival goes far beyond a business. But if they don’t get the punters, all the benefits of Glasto’s philanthropy ceases to exist. Don’t get me wrong, I can’t see that ever happening, as the lure and mystique around the festival will always cycle through the new generations and I think the demand will always be there; and rightly so.

It’s a balancing act of keeping the masses happy. If they can book 3 bonafide superstars, then that’s the route they’re going to go. If there’s an opportunity to give someone a boost who deserves it then they have the capabilities to do so, which is another reason of what makes the festival the best in the world, as you’ll always find your tastes covered on one of the many other stages. 

Ultimately it differs every year as who they can book comes down to who’s touring. Personally I’m not a fan of Billie or Harry, but would definitely be at Macca or Kendrick, but it is what it is and having been the Worthy several times before I know the headliners don’t make or break your weekend. 

[StevieGed]

19 minutes ago, gfa said:

George Ezra is quite different to foals and wolf alice - he only has 2 albums and both have been  commercially very well received

From my perspective he’s now on the cusp of reaching those heights or remaining as the subheadliner / big name for the mid tier fests headliner. I thoroughly enjoyed him in the sun on the Friday in 2019, harmless sing alongs whilst pissed, just for me I don’t think he ever reaches headline status.

[mufcok]

The Noel article is an interesting one, especially given it specifically states the Pyramid.

He's a completely different person to what he once was (you'd hope so at his age). It's become popular to dislike him as Liam is now the 'man of the people', all very baffling to me - but that's a discussion for another day. He cited Kanye as a big influence on his last album, rewind the clock and he wouldn't have even mentioned his name in a sentence, let alone cite him as an influence. Harry Styles, though? I just don't see it personally. 

He's also a punter there every year, so I'm not sure he'd just be subbing anyone. Worth noting he absolutely loves The Strokes (I jest. As much as I'd love it, The Strokes aren't headlining Glastonbury). Let's hope he's still subbing Paul 🙂

[Deaf Nobby Burton]

1 hour ago, mattiloy said:

I disagree. Glastonbury is more than just a business and most of the decisions they make across the piste reflect that.

If they wanted to be just a business, they should cut their charitable donations, start with sponsorship, do more tiered ticket pricing for VIPs, replace the secret piano bar with a secret VIP champagne bar where you can only pay in GlastoCoin and on the wall hangs a plaque bearing an NFT for a gif hanging above it depicting Tony benn in his grave revolving at high speed.

In other words, make it more like @Suprefan’s fave - Coachella!

I think that’d be awful and I hope (and believe) that most other attendees are not super turned on by the idea of the commercialisation of the festival.

I think that the lineup on the whole reflects the competing aims of balancing relevance and revenue with values.

But the headliners are the biggies. They are the talking points. And they are what the folks at home will tune in for. And I reckon it’d be nice if Glastonbury took a chance on maybe 1/3 of the acts each year being homegrown, more independent type acts alongside the big hitters. Call it the ’showcase’ slot, which seeks to elevate and promote that kind of act.

But that’s just taking it to the absolute extreme. They’re not like a ‘normal’ business, and very obviously they aren’t just our for profit to the point your suggestions above would ever happen, but ultimately if they don’t sell their tickets the festival wouldn’t be what it is, so they still have to think like a business to some extent. They have repeatedly shown they don’t have ever want to take their popularity for granted and assume it will always be an over subscribed success, hence a number of things they do are driven by ensuring the festival remains popular, and never just assuming it will.

It’s not a binary situation between their absolute utopia and a capitalist money making machine, it’s far more nuanced that that.

[Leyrulion]

8 hours ago, mattiloy said:

I disagree. Glastonbury is more than just a business and most of the decisions they make across the piste reflect that.

If they wanted to be just a business, they should cut their charitable donations, start with sponsorship, do more tiered ticket pricing for VIPs, replace the secret piano bar with a secret VIP champagne bar where you can only pay in GlastoCoin and on the wall hangs a plaque bearing an NFT for a gif hanging above it depicting Tony benn in his grave revolving at high speed.

In other words, make it more like @Suprefan’s fave - Coachella!

I think that’d be awful and I hope (and believe) that most other attendees are not super turned on by the idea of the commercialisation of the festival.

I think that the lineup on the whole reflects the competing aims of balancing relevance and revenue with values.

But the headliners are the biggies. They are the talking points. And they are what the folks at home will tune in for. And I reckon it’d be nice if Glastonbury took a chance on maybe 1/3 of the acts each year being homegrown, more independent type acts alongside the big hitters. Call it the ’showcase’ slot, which seeks to elevate and promote that kind of act.

You can still be a business without wanting to extract every ounce of profit from an event in one year. 

There are a great many examples of ethical businesses operating all over the country, of which Glastonbury is one. 

Businesses often have values, Glastonbury is clear about what those are for them and where it won't compromise for the guest experience.

Edited February 4, 2022 by Leyrulion

[JoeyT]

Peak trolling is the official festival twitter retweeting the glasto countdown account I swear.

[Superscally]

15 hours ago, gfa said:

George Ezra is quite different to foals and wolf alice - he only has 2 albums and both have been  commercially very well received

He's also shit, with a weird put-on voice.

[gooner1990]

Liam on R2 this morning saying Noel is playing.....so unless he's headlining the Other Stage he's going to sub Harry Styles/Paul McCartney on the Saturday at the Pyramid I think.

[Neil]

15 hours ago, mattiloy said:

They do.

Just think there are better choices to replace Macca than Harry Styles.

And also Dizzee Rascal should have been given it ahead of Jay Z… not that Jay Z should never have headlined, just that why so keen to put a guy on who, whilst admittedly a big star and hip hop icon on the other side of the pond, was at the time comparable in chart performance and notoriety to a homegrown talent, instead of that homegrown talent?

jay-z probably gave access to bey.

[Hugh Jass]

10 minutes ago, Superscally said:

He's also shit, with a weird put-on voice.

Being shit and being popular are not mutually exclusive.

[Quark]

12 minutes ago, Superscally said:

He's also shit, with a weird put-on voice.

For some reason your loathing of Ezra always makes me chuckle. Dunno why. Just seems so heartfelt.

[Graphic Design Pete]

12 minutes ago, Quark said:

For some reason your loathing of Ezra always makes me chuckle. Dunno why. Just seems so heartfelt.

I could never hate George Ezra. I could dislike his music but he just strikes me as a guy who just loves what he does, and who could hate that?

[Neil]

25 minutes ago, Graphic Design Pete said:

I could never hate George Ezra. I could dislike his music but he just strikes me as a guy who just loves what he does, and who could hate that?

its easier to be numb to his existence.

[kalifire]

When Ezra appeared on Live at Worthy Farm, we all went to put the kettle on / take a dump / go for a quick walk / put our fingers in our ears and chant Hare Krishna for ten minutes.

[Superscally]

1 hour ago, Quark said:

For some reason your loathing of Ezra always makes me chuckle. Dunno why. Just seems so heartfelt.

I generally go all in. For better or for worse! 😃

 

 

[thewayiam]

17 hours ago, mufcok said:

The Noel article is an interesting one, especially given it specifically states the Pyramid.

He's a completely different person to what he once was (you'd hope so at his age). It's become popular to dislike him as Liam is now the 'man of the people', all very baffling to me - but that's a discussion for another day. He cited Kanye as a big influence on his last album, rewind the clock and he wouldn't have even mentioned his name in a sentence, let alone cite him as an influence. Harry Styles, though? I just don't see it personally. 

He's also a punter there every year, so I'm not sure he'd just be subbing anyone. Worth noting he absolutely loves The Strokes (I jest. As much as I'd love it, The Strokes aren't headlining Glastonbury). Let's hope he's still subbing Paul 🙂

I would guess that Harry is going to close out Sunday if he's there for the missing Kendrick.

I'd also guess that if people want to get out the car parks relatively easy early then that is your chance.

[sisco]

3 minutes ago, thewayiam said:

I would guess that Harry is going to close out Sunday if he's there for the missing Kendrick.

I'd also guess that if people want to get out the car parks relatively easy early then that is your chance.

He can only play Friday or Saturday