The Beginner's Guide To Glastonbury Festival?

[AlexOvd]

Probably an absurd question but it is interesting for first timers like me. Do they give some sort of map/guide in the entrance where you can check where things are located/timetables?

[The Nal]

Try get your plopsies cycle to the morning. Nowt worse than being stuck up in the SE corner in the dark needing to go. 

 

  

Just now, AlexOvd said:

Probably an absurd question but it is interesting for first timers like me. Do they give some sort of map/guide in the entrance where you can check where things are located/timetables?

You you get a mini program in a lanyard. Chuck it around your neck. 

Edited March 15, 2022 by The Nal

[Quark]

Just now, AlexOvd said:

Probably an absurd question but it is interesting for first timers like me. Do they give some sort of map/guide in the entrance where you can check where things are located/timetables?

They do.  You'll get a little booklet guide in a lanyard that you can carry around with a little map and most of the stage times, and a bigger magazine-sized guide with loads more info that's perfect for reading at the tent.

[Quark]

2 minutes ago, The Nal said:

Try get your plopsies cycle to the morning. Nowt worse than being stuck up in the SE corner in the dark needing to go. 

 

That made me laugh enough just reading it. The clip finished me off.

[fred quimby]

1 minute ago, AlexOvd said:

Probably an absurd question but it is interesting for first timers like me. Do they give some sort of map/guide in the entrance where you can check where things are located/timetables?

Yes  you get a programme and also a guide in a lanyard with a map and what is on the main stages.

If like me you will read and instantly forget

[nikkic]

53 minutes ago, Florian Saucer Attack said:

Avoid booze, pills and powders until all of your group's tents have been erected

After that it's party time

Alternatively bosh a load of K and then try and erect your tent before you are no longer capable. A race against time. 

[Ryan1984]

29 minutes ago, Quark said:

They do.  You'll get a little booklet guide in a lanyard that you can carry around with a little map and most of the stage times, and a bigger magazine-sized guide with loads more info that's perfect for reading at the tent.

They force it into your hands the moment after you’ve queued for hours and stepped through those hallowed gates with all your luggage on your person!

[Crazyfool01]

Dont look back in Anger ..... look forward with appreciation ... 

[Leyrulion]

2 hours ago, Joshuwarr said:

I would say allow yourself to rest and relax a bit too. Don't feel guilty if you take some time out to sit down, eat and just people watch for a few hours. Or even just chill by the tent for a bit. It is very easy to overdo it and potentially make the entire experience quite difficult - especially when you're hitting 30k steps a day

This is such a good tip.

There wasn't a sub headliner I wanted to see on Saturday last year. So I joined the queue for the lush noodle place by the other stage that mid act had no queue and just chilled at the tent, had a little nap and prepared myself for the chemical brothers.

After 4 days having a little space to myself was incredible.

Edited March 15, 2022 by Leyrulion

[gigpusher]

1 hour ago, Quark said:

Ooh I shall check that out. Although I would feel like I'm cheating on TTT...

With how manic the fest can be I think a lot of time people either don't expect something like that to be there, or don't give themselves permission to just sit down and take the weight off for bit because they feel like it's somehow wasting time or not the right thing to do. 

Cup of tea and piece of cake is 10 minutes of heaven for me.

We had an afternoon tea in the greenfields last festival and it was 1000% a most brilliant decision on our part. 

[Quark]

11 minutes ago, gigpusher said:

We had an afternoon tea in the greenfields last festival and it was 1000% a most brilliant decision on our part. 

HOLY SHITBALLS YOU CAN GET AFTERNOON TEA WITH A TEAPOT?!?!?!?!?

*adds to must-sees alongside Diana Ross.

[clarkete]

Ensure you attend with pals who have greater tolerance levels than yourself. 

Do go to the cider bus and drink far too much of that strong strawberry flavoured poison. 

Tell one of your well prepared friends that you "never say no to anything at Glastonbury". 

Learn about the limitations of your mind, body and bladder. 

Spend 20 years wondering how come the other efesters remember so clearly what year they saw band x instead of y, yet you have to look on t'internet or in an old guide. 

Yeah...not sure if I recommend doing it that way tbh 😉, but however you do the festival it's bloody good fun, you'll always regret missing something and feel sad when it's over and you have to wait until you go again. 

[clarkete]

4 minutes ago, Quark said:

HOLY SHITBALLS YOU CAN GET AFTERNOON TEA WITH A TEAPOT?!?!?!?!?

*adds to must-sees alongside Diana Ross.

Forwards message to Tiny Tea snitch line. 

[blutarsky]

1 hour ago, AlexOvd said:

Probably an absurd question but it is interesting for first timers like me. Do they give some sort of map/guide in the entrance where you can check where things are located/timetables?

In 2019 we got the lanyard with mini-guide and the full programme, both pictured below. 

Edited March 15, 2022 by blutarsky

[Quark]

11 minutes ago, clarkete said:

Forwards message to Tiny Tea snitch line. 

If I get there and they give me my tea in a paper cup I will hunt you down

[Hotchilidog]

2 hours ago, gigpusher said:

See I love the over planning but I do know I won't get to do most of it. I have plans for hot weather, rainy weather, if I'm tired etc and a lot of those plans go by the wayside but planning before hand gets me excited and keeps me happy. So if they like planning I'd say absolutely do it but be realistic with yourself what you think you can do and what you actually can do are usually 2 very different things. 

I always overplan Glastonbury, I love pouring over the schedule and the map for weeks/months on end. it's all ar too the fun.

Of course once I arrive it all goes in the bin 🙂

Edited March 15, 2022 by Hotchilidog

[Brave Sir Robin]

1 hour ago, fred quimby said:

Neck these kid and let's go

What Mum

Shut up and double drop.

Reminds me of a mother-daughter conversation witnessed from the coffee queue:

"Mum, are you putting sugar in your coffee??"

"To be honest love, that's the least of your worries"

[blutarsky]

1 minute ago, Brave Sir Robin said:

Reminds me of a mother-daughter conversation witnessed from the coffee queue:

"Mum, are you putting sugar in your coffee??"

"To be honest love, that's the least of your worries"

No, it's MDMA. 

[gigpusher]

27 minutes ago, Quark said:

HOLY SHITBALLS YOU CAN GET AFTERNOON TEA WITH A TEAPOT?!?!?!?!?

*adds to must-sees alongside Diana Ross.

Can't remember the name of the place but it was in the Greenfields and was not planned so I probably had at least 10 other places to be. My husband wearing the blue wig means it was Sunday afternoon so it was probably when most people were watching Kylie. I do not regret my decision!

[clarkete]

15 minutes ago, Quark said:

If I get there and they give me my tea in a paper cup I will hunt you down

It's also been one of my regular pilgrimages - from just wanting a nice healing brew, those years where there's a shortage of places to sit or now that I try not to get ripped to the t*ts it's a good place to chill and avoid getting too pished. 

Edited March 15, 2022 by clarkete

[gigpusher]

12 minutes ago, Hotchilidog said:

I always overplan Glastonbury, I love pouring over the schedule and the map for weeks/months on end. it's all ar too the fun.

Of course once I arrive it all goes in the bin 🙂

Yes for me it's part of the build up. Also I think there's a fine line between not planning anything and wandering aimlessly and always missing out on everything. I just make lots of very fluid plans. I tend to look at it each morning to remind myself what's on offer but I have sacked off all plans and sat in those deckchairs in the theatre and circus fields for several hours before and had a bloody brilliant time. 

[Gingerfish79]

2 hours ago, AlexOvd said:

Probably an absurd question but it is interesting for first timers like me. Do they give some sort of map/guide in the entrance where you can check where things are located/timetables?

There will also be a good iphone/android app released closer to the festival. It has a map and stage times etc. 

[Superscally]

7 hours ago, crazyfool1 said:

Is this a story that needs penning next ? 🙂 

I could tell you one about being starkers at 6am dancing with RoboCop in Shangri-la? 

[marathonsteve]

36 minutes ago, Superscally said:

Just relax by the Glastonbury sign daily and look out at all the lovely people

Edited March 15, 2022 by marathonsteve
R

[Deaf Nobby Burton]

I find Fri-Sunday takes care of itself, there are a always acts you miss and others that you didn’t plan on seeing that you see, but it all kind of flows naturally given your mood, weather, drunkenness etc.

It’s the Thursday I generally always have grand plans for and stuff to see, but it always goes out the window and we end up just getting pissed somewhere completely different.

Edited March 15, 2022 by Deaf Nobby Burton