Bearded Theory 2009
Friday 15th to Sunday 17th May 2009Bradley Nook Farm, Hulland Ward, Ashbourne, Derbyshire , England MAP
£45 for a weekend ticket, day tickets £20/under 16s £10/under 5s £5
Daily capacity: 1,500
"It's a village fete gone wrong", the colourful festival T-shirt quotes. "It's a growing festival coping admirably with freaky weather" might have been more apt. Having bucketed down for much of Friday without dampening many spirits, some sudden and vicious wind blew off the cover of the professional-looking and certainly seemingly-unmovable main stage early Saturday evening. And yet despite that major set-back, despite the cordoned-off stage being investigated by the HSE, and despite all the mud, the party was enabled to go on into the night and through all of Sunday. Quite probably an astonishing effort from all those working there.
Initial impressions were, amazingly, of no-one being obviously injured. Wild rumours quickly circulated as emergency services arrived, but later in the evening I heard that just three people were taken to hospital. This was confirmed the next day by clearly-weary festival management who were kind enough to go round areas of the campsite to clarify what is and what isn't. We also found out that all three injured people decided to come back on-site, and that a lot of hard work and very little sleep took place to keep things going.
Sunday had a lot of questions marks across the morning, what with approximately a third to a half of people clearly having gone home judging by the gaps in the camping and car park areas. At one point a whole new stage arrived and was starting to be set up, only to have disappeared a little further down the line. Early afternoon had someone with a loudspeaker came through the camp-site announcing that the Campfire Stage, previously thought unusable, was now to become the main stage through having a temporary sound-desk set up. Hand-written schedules of acts are found taped up around key areas of the site, and music is made available again to those that were still braving the ongoing mixed bag of atrocious weather.
Meantime the huge Magical Sounds Dance Tent continued to beat harmoniously along as if nothing had happened, only compromising through having a curfew at around 10pm instead of the anticipated midnight. Its acts were on-time pretty much all weekend, everything seemed to run very smoothly, and the many visits I made there were always rewarded with great beat-led music of some form. Sunday's highlight for me was a performance by Sunfish featuring vocals and guitar, reminding me of System 7 but with harder beats. There was also an abundance of DJs, and by the end, dancing fairies on each side of the stage. Best stage of the weekend therefore, or as one random voice from a tent said as I walked past it Saturday morning, "The Dance Tent were mint!"
Strengths and weaknesses now in no particular order, from my personal perspective and pretty much independent of the weather in my opinion. First off, there was a nice set of friendly stewards, matching a significant lack of aggression and good camaraderie across the whole festival. There were regularly-cleaned toilets, usually with instant-soap and toilet paper (& obligatory muddy floor). Not much litter overall, and plenty of spacious recycling points. Quick bar service, albeit with the annoying token system back but then with readily-available refunds if needed. The bar had a good variety of ales and ciders, all served in biodegradable cups for when you just couldn't locate the bins.
The Green Fairy main stage suffered from bands being on late too often, or in The Beetroot Kings' case, playing about four hours early. Don't know why it happened that way, but it would have been helpful to have been updated on running orders, as was managed once that main stage was no-more.
There were enough food stalls and cafes, some of them very nice. There was an abundance of stalls selling things, including medieval-styled items and jerky; indeed there was a whole sub-section of a medieval camp with demonstrations of that lifestyle. Good to have had a camping gear stall, but next time a basic-essentials stall would be a good addition regular cigarettes were like gold-dust come Sunday.
Other musical highlights included a Friday headline Hawkwind set for the devotional, and a bass-heavy Dreadzone SoundSystem set for most other people. There was good comedy from Attila the Stockbroker at the main stage, and a fine all-round laugh and sing-along from Hobo Jones & The Junkyard Dogs at the nicely-secluded Campfire Stage. Some captivating, stripped-down New Model Army songs were aired by Justin Sullivan & Dean White, and there was a feel-good know-what-youre-getting set from 3 Daft Monkeys. And Zetan Spore were my pick of a high-quality bunch from the Dance Tent.
Last of all, special mention to the open-mic tent and cafe, for being cosy and full of surprise musical and artistic performances before the storm, and for getting going again on the Sunday despite being blown down. They even had a mic under a new gazebo on the last day, from which acoustic performances could be enjoyed whilst sitting at an open-air table enjoying the resurrected cafés wares.
So overall, the weekend didn't go as expected, but for all the problems thrown at this quaint little festival, they found a way to carry on regardless. As their website said in reporting on the freak weather, "We are entertaining the crowd the best we can." They did, we're grateful, and it still worked in a friendly & charming manner. Same time next year then?
review by: Clive Hoadley
photos by: Phil Bull
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