singles thread

[feral chile]

you what?

If you don't ever, then you're the first person in history not to.

And surely some of what you see you've seen before, which - if honesty allows - ends in an admission?

Hey, maybe I'm wrong. I only have snippets to go on after all. But i've seen it hundreds of times before.

I take people at face value. If I'm discussing their version of what's happened, then that's what I discuss. Not my version. It's happened to them, not me, so it's their reality, not mine.

[eFestivals]

I take people at face value. If I'm discussing their version of what's happened, then that's what I discuss. Not my version. It's happened to them, not me, so it's their reality, not mine.

except of course it's not really a discussion, but someone wanting validation of the version it isn't.

I've got to say i'm finding it all hugely ironic, given other comments.

Anyway, I'll leave you both to it. I'm out of here.

[AcademicPistol]

I take people at face value. If I'm discussing their version of what's happened, then that's what I discuss. Not my version. It's happened to them, not me, so it's their reality, not mine.

Yeah I think you have to also we only have written word to go by we can't hear the expression or see the body language of worm in this instance.

[worm]

Honesty? A telling it like it is? Not indulging fantasies?

Assumption. Arrogance. Ignorance.

You have nothing other than my version of events to go on Chief. Big up yo'self.

[eFestivals]

You have nothing other than my version of events to go on Chief.

and that's *EXACTLY* what I'm going on. I'm just not going with the words you've used.

Yes it's assumption - which is exactly what all your own words on the subject have been too. So I'm doing nowt different to what you're doing yourself. Get over it.

[worm]

and that's *EXACTLY* what I'm going on. I'm just not going with the words you've used.

Oh, you mean you've made it all up. Cool.

That'll be why you were wrong and feral was right. Everything's cool. There was no delusion, only panic through not knowing the score. Talked to her on the phone for 2 hours last night and we were laughing at everything.

Edited August 9, 2012 by worm

[eFestivals]

Oh, you mean you've made it all up. Cool.

it's called 'interpretation'. You know, exactly the same thing as the 'discipline' you so love does?

I guess it's only other people who have psych problems, eh?

Edited August 9, 2012 by eFestivals

[worm]

it's called 'interpretation'. You know, exactly the same thing as the 'discipline' you so love does?

I guess it's only other people who have psych problems, eh?

No, it's called interpretation when you use what is put before you. It's called assumption when you make conclusions based on made up stuff. You aren't talking to a retard.

Anyway:

Feral: You need to find trust

You: You're in denial, you're feigning control as care, you're fucked up over a girl

Feral was right. That's because she interpreted what I'd said, rather than had the arrogance to assume what I meant.

[eFestivals]

No, it's called interpretation when you use what is put before you.

which is exactly what I did.

Just because my interpretation doesn't take your words at face value doesn't make that interpretation automatically wrong.

The fact you say I'm wrong might make me wrong. But then again, given that just about anyone would interpret your words as not being fully straight, it doesn't put me anywhere away from mainstream conclusions either.

As I say, get over it. Or are you really claiming to be the first person in human history to give a public version of your emotions which is a perfect match for what you really feel with no attempt to hide or play down the self-embarrassing bits?

Edited August 9, 2012 by eFestivals

[worm]

Just because my interpretation doesn't take your words at face value doesn't make that interpretation automatically wrong.

Neil, it was assumption. I'll tell you why:

I said I cared about her. Feral took me at my word and said that in that case, going on what I'd been saying, I'd need to find trust. This was no doubt because what I was surmising was unhealthy. So she trusted me when I said I cared and interpreted what was lacking for that care to shine.

You, on the other hand, were hell-bent on the assumption that I didn't care and that I was wanting to control. You didn't trust that I cared and in fact tried to convince me that I was a control freak.

Your interpretation was shit Neil because, as ever, you don't take people at their word and try your utmost to contradict them. Especially me. I'm not stupid.

[eFestivals]

Your interpretation was shit Neil because, as ever, you don't take people at their word and try your utmost to contradict them. Especially me. I'm not stupid.

you have a mighty high - and very wrong - opinion of yourself. Which causes you to have a wrong opinion of me.

Neil, it was assumption. I'll tell you why:

I said I cared about her. Feral took me at my word and said that in that case, going on what I'd been saying, I'd need to find trust. This was no doubt because what I was surmising was unhealthy. So she trusted me when I said I cared and interpreted what was lacking for that care to shine.

You, on the other hand, were hell-bent on the assumption that I didn't care and that I was wanting to control. You didn't trust that I cared and in fact tried to convince me that I was a control freak.

you said some stuff. That stuff was not the whole truth and nothing but the truth (I refer you to my comment in my last post).

People have a choice. They can indulge a fantasy or they can cut past the crap.

And your fantasies continue unhindered, with your belief that I "tried to convince me that I was a control freak".

(I could give a few different versions - all true - of how you don't even believe that latest fantasy, just as you don't the longer running one here. I'd even quote you some of your favourite lines in doing so ).

Get over it.

Edited August 9, 2012 by eFestivals

[worm]

I tell you what. Try this instead, seeing as you're finding it so very hard to grasp. I couldn't give a fuck about your opinion regarding my, yes my, not your, problems. Nor do I wish to make the matter ours. You don't count. I'm not interested in your opinion. Feral had it covered.

Comprende? Or are you going to continue with your leeching bollocks?

Edited August 9, 2012 by worm

[eFestivals]

I couldn't give a fuck about your opinion regarding my, yes my, not your, problems.

I don't give a fuck about your problem or your opinion of my opinion, or even just your opinion. You chose to post it in a public message board where it's open for comment, so I commented.

Nor do I wish to make the matter ours.

and nor do I. Which is why I keep trying to back out without shaming you, but you're determined to make an argument of it.

You don't count. I'm not interested in your opinion. Feral had it covered.

you're defo right about not being interested in my opinion. And it's hardly surprising that you're loving Feral's straight take of your words.

After all, that's how these things always go. Which is what I was pointing out that you don't like being pointed out.

Comprende? Or are you going to continue with your leeching bollocks?

Another great display of your literary expertise, and your psychological analysis skills. PMSL.

[worm]

Yeah, so everything's class. Really awesome. I've even attracted my very own obsessive cyber-stalker. Sometimes you've just got to let go maaaaaaaan.

[eFestivals]

Yeah, so everything's class. Really awesome. I've even attracted my very own obsessive cyber-stalker. Sometimes you've just got to let go maaaaaaaan.

There's no end to you, is there. :lol:

[worm]

Not according to my biggest fan, no.

[eFestivals]

back to what I said about Katster now liking muscles .... perhaps that's the stress of the break up?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-19180983

Whatever is going on with Katster's tastes in men, that research pretty much gets to show that 'nature' or 'instinct' or whatever you might call it is in the mix somewhere. It's not merely chosen or experienced 'personal tastes' for what is considered attractive.

Edited August 10, 2012 by eFestivals

[Rufus Gwertigan]

back to what I said about Katster now liking muscles .... perhaps that's the stress of the break up?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-19180983

Whatever is going on with Katster's tastes in men, that research pretty much gets to show that 'nature' or 'instinct' or whatever you might call it is in the mix somewhere. It's not merely chosen or experienced 'personal tastes' for what is considered attractive.

So have you been going to the gym??

[Katster]

back to what I said about Katster now liking muscles .... perhaps that's the stress of the break up?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-19180983

Whatever is going on with Katster's tastes in men, that research pretty much gets to show that 'nature' or 'instinct' or whatever you might call it is in the mix somewhere. It's not merely chosen or experienced 'personal tastes' for what is considered attractive.

it mentions change in lifestyle and environment being a factor. So perhaps me going to the gym more (and being determined to get fit) has contributed? One thing that really annoyed me with my ex was his constant complaints of being unhappy with his body yet never doing anything to try to sort it, so perhaps by seeing someone who clearly looks after themselves attracts me for this reason? I am sure there are lots of factors i just find it so odd when i have had a type my whole life, and actually used to be massively turned off by muscles, to suddenly experience such a shift in taste.

In other news i am still 100% sure i made the right choice. I am sad it had to end and i am gutted to be back to just me again, but so much was not right in our relationship i feel like a huge weight has been lifted. What i must do now is stay strong and not let the boredom get to me, cos that's when i start panicking, rushing and making huge mistakes. I have done ok with that so far

[Rufus Gwertigan]

it mentions change in lifestyle and environment being a factor. So perhaps me going to the gym more (and being determined to get fit) has contributed? One thing that really annoyed me with my ex was his constant complaints of being unhappy with his body yet never doing anything to try to sort it, so perhaps by seeing someone who clearly looks after themselves attracts me for this reason? I am sure there are lots of factors i just find it so odd when i have had a type my whole life, and actually used to be massively turned off by muscles, to suddenly experience such a shift in taste.

In other news i am still 100% sure i made the right choice. I am sad it had to end and i am gutted to be back to just me again, but so much was not right in our relationship i feel like a huge weight has been lifted. What i must do now is stay strong and not let the boredom get to me, cos that's when i start panicking, rushing and making huge mistakes. I have done ok with that so far

Seriuosly Kat, and you will hate me for saying this. I don't think you are 100% sure. You really need to have a good think.

Why do I say this?? You are putting it out on the web. I know we dont know each other really close (not from trying), but I know you well enough.

Just be honest to yourself. I never met Mr Cheese, but to be able to have you as a partner he must have been an awesome guy. I was talking about you with Katrina and you are on the list of potential step mums.

[Katster]

This is my outlet. From what i have said what gives you any reason to think i am not 100%? I might not be 100% about being alone, but its a lot better than being with the wrong person. Of course he is awesome, but lots of people are awesome, it doesn't mean i want or have to share my whole life with them though!

[worm]

back to what I said about Katster now liking muscles .... perhaps that's the stress of the break up?

http://www.bbc.co.uk...onment-19180983

Whatever is going on with Katster's tastes in men, that research pretty much gets to show that 'nature' or 'instinct' or whatever you might call it is in the mix somewhere. It's not merely chosen or experienced 'personal tastes' for what is considered attractive.

Nature and instinct are part of personal taste and choice. It's interesting how mass-published research like this makes such distinctions. It's why theory is massively important. Interesting, nevertheless.

Edited August 10, 2012 by worm

[worm]

it mentions change in lifestyle and environment being a factor.

They always come out with this shit in all of that 'moving on' w*nk that gets published. It's just a temporary measure. You'll soon fall back into the identity you have, regardless of changes in lifestyle and environment. And that's when you'll miss whatever it is that you've given up. Whether that's something unique to him, in which case you'll be missing something forever more, or whether that's something in yourself, in which case you'll eventually get it again with someone else, you'll have to wait and find out.

Edited August 10, 2012 by worm

[Katster]

To be honest i am not entirely sure i will miss anything. The whole reason i ended things was because i sat back and thought, what exactly am i getting from him, and the answer was not a lot. No affection, no emotional support, no help around the house. Financial support maybe but since when did i give a flying funk about money?

I have been doing things alone for around the past year or two, its just that now i will be doing those things alone for one person rather than for two.

[worm]

I have been doing things alone for around the past year or two, its just that now i will be doing those things alone for one person rather than for two.

Well then stop moaning. It sounds like you're more scared of being alone. Understandable as you haven't been single for a while. You've chucked your security blanket, not your love interest. It would seem that that died long ago.

So this is about you and your needs. You need to enjoy the trappings of being single, which is harder the older you get. Late teens and early twenties, no problem, late twenties onwards, fucking nightmare.