singles thread

[rachbon]

Perhaps tell it like it is in a nice way, rather than being rude about it?

And gemstar didn't do anything markeee-esque, she made a drunken mistake and asked for advice.

if i meet you at glastonbury you'll see i'm not rude.

i do know my posts can be harsh at times, i just say exactly what i think.

i know i don't have to read your posts in this thread, but i read them in the hope that you have sorted things with FH.

i can't really be arsed getting into the gemstar thing again. other people made the same points as me.

[feral chile]

lolbeck, I think you need to make a decision. If you're happy to continue as you are, fine, go for it.

If you really want a relationship with this guy, then you need to stop having sex with him or giving him any intimate contact that you wouldn't give any other friend. And ask him if he'd ever consider you as a girlfriend.

His friend might be telling the truth, but it doesn't really matter why FH won't commit. The hard facts are that if he likes you enough, and he wants to keep you, he'll be ready to commit. And if not, at least you'll know where you are once and for all.

While you're having sex with him, he's got nothing to lose continuing with things just as they are. If he feels he's going to lose that unless he does something, he'll either let you go or hang on to you. At least you'd know.

[Paul ™]

Sounds like the classic f**k buddy situation win-win

[bunique]

Sounds like the classic f**k buddy situation win-win

Except now she feels more than he does - win-lose.

[feral chile]

Sounds like the classic f**k buddy situation win-win

Yeah would be, if both just wanted that. But the fact that lolbeck is so stressed over this suggests that she wants more.

[gemstarrr]

had my first shift together since on monday with the guy from work.

by unbelievably bad luck it ended up being just me, him and a girl (who i don't really like but he's good mates with) on a tiny bar in a small room. (there are 2 other main rooms in the club, with 10+ staff on each bar)

was dead most of the night so lots of time for talking.

but we couldn't say anything cos this other girl was there, so lots of things left unsaid. did notice he kept looking at me, particularly when other men were attempting to chat me up over the bar.

so no idea whats happening there or how he feels, next time i see him will probably be staff xmas night out :S

but anyway looks like the londoner is finally coming up to see me on friday! so think i'm going to see what happens with him before i even think about whats going on with work guy.

im quite nervous, its been over 2 months since we met, what if i don't fancy him or i don't feel the same way? i've got a whole weekend of awkwardness! and then if everything does go well and we still really like each other, he still lives in london. its like a lose/lose situation really...with little bits of win.

P.S. lolbeck, share all the detail you want, this is a place for advising each other is it not?

P.P.S I'd appreciate it if you'd all stop comparing me to Markee. and bringing up my sex life as a judge of character on other completely irrelevant threads. yes Paul im talking to you!

Edited November 27, 2010 by gemstarrr

[jump]

Spent most of last night trying to get away from a crazy Irish blonde that likes me but my mate fancies her and is too much of a nice guy to do anything about.

[feral chile]

had my first shift together since on monday with the guy from work.

by unbelievably bad luck it ended up being just me, him and a girl (who i don't really like but he's good mates with) on a tiny bar in a small room. (there are 2 other main rooms in the club, with 10+ staff on each bar)

was dead most of the night so lots of time for talking.

but we couldn't say anything cos this other girl was there, so lots of things left unsaid. did notice he kept looking at me, particularly when other men were attempting to chat me up over the bar.

so no idea whats happening there or how he feels, next time i see him will probably be staff xmas night out :S

but anyway looks like the londoner is finally coming up to see me on friday! so think i'm going to see what happens with him before i even think about whats going on with work guy.

im quite nervous, its been over 2 months since we met, what if i don't fancy him or i don't feel the same way? i've got a whole weekend of awkwardness! and then if everything does go well and we still really like each other, he still lives in london. its like a lose/lose situation really...with little bits of win.

P.S. lolbeck, share all the detail you want, this is a place for advising each other is it not?

P.P.S I'd appreciate it if you'd all stop comparing me to Markee. and bringing up my sex life as a judge of character on other completely irrelevant threads. yes Paul im talking to you!

Really? Bloody hell, I thought we'd done the sexual liberation thing half a century ago. I'm astounded that people come in for moral censure for anything between 2 consenting adults.

There's enough people causing pain and hassle out there in the world as it is - what's wrong with a good bit of hedonism?

And what's morality got to do with sex? Unless it involves hurting another person?

Edited November 27, 2010 by feral chile

[gemstarrr]

Really? Bloody hell, I thought we'd done the sexual liberation thing half a century ago. I'm astounded that people come in for moral censure for anything between 2 consenting adults.

There's enough people causing pain and hassle out there in the world as it is - what's wrong with a good bit of hedonism?

And what's morality got to do with sex? Unless it involves hurting another person?

i suppose it wasnt exactly a judge of character.

he said that i should go to an AA meeting and the clap clinic. in a thread about tuition fees where i was only posting my view on the lib dems.

just plain nasty!

[gemstarrr]

Spent most of last night trying to get away from a crazy Irish blonde that likes me but my mate fancies her and is too much of a nice guy to do anything about.

ergh its horrible being in situations like that.

its even worse if you actually really like the person but cant do anything cos you dont want to upset your mate!

but gotta say i love the irish accent!

[Gre]

Sounds like the classic f**k buddy situation win-win

Yeah would be, if both just wanted that. But the fact that lolbeck is so stressed over this suggests that she wants more.

Sounds exactly like the classic f**k buddy situation I'm afraid - from what I've experienced/read, its very rare for it to work out well for both parties.

I feel bad talking about other people the whole time, time to talk about myself. I think I mentioned a while back that I was going on a date with a girl who was a virgin. We've been 'officially together' for about 4 months now, and i'm rather enjoying having a normal relationship and seeing where things go. I think she likes me more than I do her though, which is a little worrying. We shall see though!

(And in anticipation of the inevitable question; she's still a virgin, but I don't think she will be for much longer. Weirdly I haven't missed the sex... perhaps I was in a long-distance relationship for too long before this )

[Gre]

edit; DP action. Possibly due to server upgrades, possibly due to me being an idiot.

Edited November 29, 2010 by Gre

[Cardboard Box City]

edit; DP action.

Don't think its a bit soon to be suggesting that sort of thing? Especially if she's still a virgin too.

[Gre]

Don't think its a bit soon to be suggesting that sort of thing? Especially if she's still a virgin too.

No joke, she brought up 3somes on our second date. Unfortunately about a month later I discovered she meant MMF.

She's a bit of a freak, this one

[ampersand]

No joke, she brought up 3somes on our second date. Unfortunately about a month later I discovered she meant MMF.

She's a bit of a freak, this one

go for it. whats the worst that could happen?

[sifi]

go for it. whats the worst that could happen?

You could end up touching another man's penis with yours?

[ampersand]

You could end up touching another man's penis with yours?

what a disaster!!!11

[jump]

Hmmm...found out an ex has been asking about (and in a way that she knows I will know) which immediately make me suspicious that she's upto something but not sure what.

[amy246]

Had a nice chat with fit postie earlier, stood there for 5 minutes in the snow talking when he should have been working and i should have been walking the dog. Then ended up texting each other after (mainly about playing in the snow!). He's really nice, and we get on well however I don't know whether he is still seeing someone or not.

[Gre]

go for it. whats the worst that could happen?

Maybe I'd like her to myself for a bit Plus I'd want a trade off for some FFM action (not too far) down the road too!

[rabid]

Hmmm...found out an ex has been asking about (and in a way that she knows I will know) which immediately make me suspicious that she's upto something but not sure what.

She's an ex for a reason. Forget it!

[jump]

She's an ex for a reason. Forget it!

True, but the reason was she got offered a job for 6 months touring the country. She decided to split to despite me want try the long distance thing.

[metallimuse]

Spent the past month with this girl from work who i really like.Spent afew nights together and really connected but she wanted to take things slow and told me why,because her ex got her pregnant,dumped her then she had a miscarraige,and I was totally cool with that given the circumstances.

She told me last Saturday that she was ready to take a chance and see what could happen with us.She then went on holiday to Leeds for a week in which we text everyday.

She came back yesterday and told one guy at work she shagged 3 blokes while away and told my best mate at work that she f**ked some guy on Monday because they were snowed in.2 days after she told me she wanted more.

I can't get my head around it.I know she likes to run her mouth as she's told me before she has at work for whatever reason but why do it now?She must of known that people would tell me as everyone knows about us at work?

Help!

[jump]

Spent the past month with this girl from work who i really like.Spent afew nights together and really connected but she wanted to take things slow and told me why,because her ex got her pregnant,dumped her then she had a miscarraige,and I was totally cool with that given the circumstances.

She told me last Saturday that she was ready to take a chance and see what could happen with us.She then went on holiday to Leeds for a week in which we text everyday.

She came back yesterday and told one guy at work she shagged 3 blokes while away and told my best mate at work that she f**ked some guy on Monday because they were snowed in.2 days after she told me she wanted more.

I can't get my head around it.I know she likes to run her mouth as she's told me before she has at work for whatever reason but why do it now?She must of known that people would tell me as everyone knows about us at work?

Help!

If it was me I'd walk, either she's a bullshitter or playing games and I'd just wouldn't bother but that's me though.

Best thing to do is talk to her, there's something wrong with that story and sounds more likely she's bullshitting other people rather than f**king random 4 guys in the space of a week whilst not sleeping with a guy she's going out with for a month.

[brighteyes]

Yeah she sounds like a dick I'm afraid mate.