Christenings

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

I wouldn't want to enrol my kids into a club which is homophobic, sexist and responsible for the death of millions of people. Why would anyone want to do that?

[feral chile]

Get them into a better school ?

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

That was something I had to consider when I lived in a rough area - the teachers in the local primary had such a snobbish, negative attitude to the kids and the parents that they didn't bother. And the local high school was scary - one kid ended up in hospital after an anonymous attack in the school playground - anonymous in the sense that he didn't see the culprits, and neither did the rest of the school. They must have been invisible, eh!

i still couldn't do it though, but I did manage to avoid my kids going to that high school.

[feral chile]

I used to say "some people believe this...." (whatever we might be talking about), and pretty much leave it at that. If I was asked what I believed, I'd say.....

didn't take too long for them to form their own opinion

Edited April 13, 2012 by feral chile

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

Reckon you both had the right idea. I had it forced upon me and I can't say it was a positive experience. On the whole I ignore it now but every now and again I'll wonder about God. I think it's possibly down to greed if I really boil it down to it's basic constituent. I don't want this to be my only life - for a number of reasons.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

i made no secret of my atheism,though,so i can't deny that may have influenced them.

[kaosmark2]

What I'm more curious about...

How do you handle death and people dying? Religious people talk about "gone to heaven" and that stuff, but what do you say when you're not drawing on that sort of stuff?

[feral chile]

Reckon you both had the right idea. I had it forced upon me and I can't say it was a positive experience. On the whole I ignore it now but every now and again I'll wonder about God. I think it's possibly down to greed if I really boil it down to it's basic constituent. I don't want this to be my only life - for a number of reasons.

[feral chile]

What I'm more curious about...

How do you handle death and people dying? Religious people talk about "gone to heaven" and that stuff, but what do you say when you're not drawing on that sort of stuff?

Edited April 13, 2012 by feral chile

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

oh, i understand perfectly the desire to believe in something better, i've often wished i could believe.

I have no more choice in my atheism than people do in their faith.

[kaosmark2]

To the kids you mean? I used to say that it was like going to sleep and not waking up. that seemed to help with death anxiety as well. I told them that i didn't believe a god would do anything evil like subjecting people to eternal torment, and that I believed the very worst thing would be we'd go to sleep.

The heaven thing did cause a lot of distress with my son though. His father's mum died and my husband had gone to see her in the chapel of rest. When my son asked where his dad was, I said he'd gone to see his mum. This really upset my son,because unbeknown to me, his aunt had told him that his nan was in heaven, so he thought his father had died.

If you mean how did we tell them someone had died...we just use to say they had died. Kids don't have a problem with this stuff as much as you'd think.

[feral chile]

dressing things up usually leads to more problems than being straight with them. I have no idea why people feel the need to basically lie to your kids to supposedly help them get through certain situations

which in the end (for many) is all religion is, a big fat lie to help us understand things - along with helping those already with power because of the lie hang on to their power

we're born, we die...

[feral chile]

we debate things just as much as most people do

we're all influenced by different things.

Bringing up kids and NOT influencing with religion, isn't the same as how religion aims to indoctrinate (imo).

I didn't say to my kids there isn't a god, much the same as I didn't tell them there aren't fairys, or superheros, etc, I'd probably say there might be..... lots of people believe in things that I don't, and genuinely trying not to say it in way that would indicate that I'm right, realising that kids tend to believe what their parents say.

That's the hard bit really. There's that part of being a parent where you want your kid to believe you.. as a parent, you're probably as close to being a real 'god' as anything. You created them!

Edited April 14, 2012 by feral chile

[sifi]

Get them into a better school ?

[sifi]

So we are agreed then. If you want the best for your children, mate with Marie Curie's descendants and send them to a normal school.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

I suppose it should be mentioned that to a lot of people religion gives them happiness and peace of mind. I've just come back from visiting my parents. Now there's two people who have faith in their religion. They are not happy clappy religious but it provides them with comfort. I guess this goes for millions of others. I think I'm trying to say it's each to their own so live and let live, rather than try to shoot somebody down in flames for their beliefs. Think I'm having one of my hippy moments!

[feral chile]

I suppose it should be mentioned that to a lot of people religion gives them happiness and peace of mind. I've just come back from visiting my parents. Now there's two people who have faith in their religion. They are not happy clappy religious but it provides them with comfort. I guess this goes for millions of others. I think I'm trying to say it's each to their own so live and let live, rather than try to shoot somebody down in flames for their beliefs. Think I'm having one of my hippy moments!

[Rufus Gwertigan]

I suppose it should be mentioned that to a lot of people religion gives them happiness and peace of mind. I've just come back from visiting my parents. Now there's two people who have faith in their religion. They are not happy clappy religious but it provides them with comfort. I guess this goes for millions of others. I think I'm trying to say it's each to their own so live and let live, rather than try to shoot somebody down in flames for their beliefs. Think I'm having one of my hippy moments!

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

Nothing worse than people that are happy clappy about their religion. Its the Hare Krishnas I cant stand with their "Guranga" and inner peace and contentedness. Thats why they all walk around with a smug grin the c**ts.

[windy_miller]

I'm a bit late to this thread so have skipped some of it. Anyway, I have been to a few Christenings over the past few years and every time I find them more and more creepy. Last year I went to a humanist naming ceremony and it was much nicer affair. You are basically welcoming the child into your own extended family and friends, rather than welcoming it into the family of the church. That seems like a much more reasonable thinig to me.

My wife refused to be a God parent to her neice a few years ago on the basis that she couldn't stand there and lie about bringing the child up to be Catholic (she is from a Catholic family). Her brother didn't mind but she had a lot of explaining to do to her parents.

Luckily my sister didn't ask me to be a God parent to her children, as I would also have refused. I think she knew what the answer would have been anyway.