Some news...

[feral chile]

I have a midwife to thank for me finally going to university. I'd had my third child, and I had it in my head that it was career/education or family, and I mentioned that I would have like to have gone. and she just said 'why don't you?'

And having 'permission' that it wouldn't make me a bad mother motivated me to go.

[Katster]

That is great Kat! And I had similar experience to Dan.... Some women just think it isn't a man business... But then piss and moan that men don't do enough blah blah blah....

Yup, this. He's been to every midwife appointment bar one (recently when it was just to do another check of BP anyway). Surely that should tell them something about how involved he would like to be?! There's one who is particularly bad and it was her who did the antenatal class on Monday. She commented at one point that "men fall asleep after sex don't they". She's obviously got a very low opinion of men for some reason, either that or a shit partner herself lol. She completely ignores Dan whenever she does my appointments, doesn't even say hello or look at him at any point. Weird. I'm just glad to have such a fantastic partner these days, although i guess that's why I'm in this mess...i wouldn't have had kids with anyone else. Awwww.

[Katster]

I just bought 5 different reusable nappies. It cost me almost £80 (with some inserts too) which sounds a lot but they will last me up to 2.5 years. Once we know which type we prefer, i should be able to buy a bundle of the same kind a bit cheaper. Now i just need to buy a bin with a lid, ha.

[bunique]

I've been googling reusables tonight too! Which ones have you gone for? Totsbots and Bumgenius seem to come out high on my friends' lists

[Katster]

I got those you mention plus miosolo, littlelamb and another i cant remember the name of but was a very cheap one. Trying to get a good mix before we decide

[Katster]

I got those you mention plus miosolo, littlelamb and another i cant remember the name of but was a very cheap one. Trying to get a good mix before we decide

[Katster]

Today I held a week old baby. Oh my god. I'm going to have one of those in only a few weeks time. Argh!

Greenfairy the swelling has gone down loads now the weather has cooled off and Dan gave me a massage (of sorts) last night that helped. Still there but nowhere near as bad. My legs are a bit of a funny colour though, kind of sunburnt looking and go white when pressed. I'm just a weirdo.

[bunique]

Might just be increased blood flow? Especially if you have poor circulation. I'm sure I read somewhere blood volume increases massively in pregnancy

[Katster]

It does, about 50%

It's work as well, it's pretty much gone over the weekend but will no doubt return by next Friday. Whilst I am trying to rest as much as possible - it's inevitable that I can't rest as much at work. My tough luck for attempting to work so close to my due date I guess but I'm determined to get as much time afterwards with the baba. Plus, if I finished now I would be sat at home alone must days with only my nerves and anxiety to start over thinking every twinge etc. In work I am much better distracted and have people around at all times.

The heat too, that really doesn't help, and its come back with a vengeance today, and I am just getting ready to go to mothercare with my mum to hopefully get a sling with some vouchers I've been given

[Katster]

But yes, increased blood flow would increase the funny colour, it kinda looks like I do when I get cold.

[Katster]

Pfft, no chance on the sling carrier thing. Come on all you hippies, where do I buy them? You know the ones I mean, old fashioned simple sling carrier, not these fancy strappy solid faffy expensive things. Grrr. I got some cute bibs though.

[bunique]

What kind of one are you looking at? I can't recommend anything you buy on the high street really as you'll only get a few weeks use out of them for the cost. You may find a Close Caboo carrier in mothercare, otherwise any of the stretchy carriers - Moby are the most common - online (love to be natural, b2b boutique) but can pick them up second hand quite cheap. I have about 3 of those lying about or out on loan (my sling collection is approaching double figures... ) if I can dig one out i can post it over

[Katster]

It's ok I found what I was looking for eventually from mothercare. Just we went out today looking and everywhere had big daft harness type things which we already have for when its older and we are going out hiking etc. I just wanted a basic sling so I can crack on with the dishes/cleaning/making tea/shopping whilst baby relaxes close to me.

[Katster]

They are fairly addictive then, eh? If it was just us we weren't going to bother with a pram but since my parents are both in their 60's we got one mostly for their benefit plus the fact it's a kick ass silver cross sleepover elegance travel system but for only a quarter of the price plus a load of other goodies thrown in with it (including the rucksack carry thingy).

We have everything we need/want now apart from a breast pump. Even my hospital bag is pretty much packed. Oh, apart from, what the hell do I wear?? I'd planned a big baggy tshirt but thinking that will be mega annoying if I do end up in the birthing pool? Surely if that happens I'm better in just a vest top??

[bunique]

I bought a gym vest that was quite loose (as had also planned pool) but ended up whipping it off at the end anyway to have skin to skin. Go for something you'll be comfortable in. I bought lots of cheap black leggings and big supermarket pants (at least a size bigger than you usually need) for afterwards and lived in those plus vest/baggy shirt combo for breastfeeding.

And yes, a little addictive, though I tell myself they all have a particular function. I was lugging my 3yr8mth year old around on my back in a wrap on Saturday morning on our walk into town

[bunique]

Also some post birth essentials for me (menfolk look away now ) were arnica capsules (most likely a load of old woo, but came recommended and I healed up great last time), tea tree oil and lavender oil for the bath, and witch hazel gel for the nether regions. Squirty bottle full of warm water for the first few loo visits. Will see if I can remember anything else!

[bunique]

In fact, it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say one of the things I'm most looking forward to with new baby is getting to use the three new (well, 1 new, 2 second hand) slings I've added to the collection!

[feral chile]

[Katster]

I found what i was looking for with mothercare in the end but cheers folks.

Last nights antenatal was pain relief. I found it all scarier than the thought of labour, to be honest! Hopeful to not need anything really. Eek.

[feral chile]

I found what i was looking for with mothercare in the end but cheers folks.

Last nights antenatal was pain relief. I found it all scarier than the thought of labour, to be honest! Hopeful to not need anything really. Eek.

only joking about the welsh shawl Kat

[bunique]

Hard to get an authentic welsh shawl!

Plan for nothing but be open to everything Kat, sounds like you are being anyway!

[Katster]

Trying to be, just really really not keen on the sounds of any of the pain relief options...especially when none of them actually take the pain away (except epidural) they just make you not care so much. The midwife described gas and air like a bottle of wine and diamorphine like three. She said the pool is best for actual pain relief, that and trying to relax. We'll soon see i guess!

[t8yman]

What have you got against epidural Kat? Or pain relief in general?

totally agree with what bunique said, We know loads of expectant mums who go in with all intentions of not having any pain relief, yet the minute they get offered epidural they cant bend over quick enough! My missus slept for 2-3 hours during both labours after her epidural, after a few hours of early stage labour, the break did her wonders ready for the big push later.

[bunique]

I "coped" (just!) on 2 paracetamol, staying active and then a bath at home up to 10cm, but couldn't have got through pushing without gas and air. I don't remember thinking I needed anything stronger at the time - I did absolutely love gas and air but I know lots of people find it makes them feel sick (I think the key is slow, steady breaths). But the pain relief is there for a reason - I only had 6 hours of contractions and so felt relatively well rested and only started getting tired after a couple of hours of pushing. If you've had days of stop/start labour and/or a long period of contractions that can really take if out of you physically and as t8y says, that's where an epidural can be invaluable! I never liked the idea of pethidine because it makes baby sleepy and I was a bit paranoid about establishing breastfeeding.

Also - I didn't think contractions were especially "painful" although I know that's the context everyone talks about them in. What they were was completely physically overwhelming, and it's very difficult to give your mind and body over to that (when you're a control freak like me...). Certainly not pleasant, but it was the relentless and unstoppable nature of them towards the end that made me lose my mind slightly I think. Like "just give me 5 minutes to catch up!" Rather than pain. I'll leave aside any talk of crowning (though that bit is mercifully short, and there's no better feeling once the head is out!!)

TMI for this hour of the morning?!

[t8yman]

I seem to remember mrs t8y sitting in the bath for about 2 hours before she finally woke me up and said "we have to go". This was at about 5am, we went to the hospital and into the ward/suite, she had epidural at around 8am, slept for a bit, woke and was a couple of hours before ready to push, baby born around 3pm. It was pretty much identical both times.

apart from the midwife screaming in agony on mrs t8ys bed when she knocked her kneecap off on the corner of the bed the first time. (and me running up and down the halls shouting "please somebody help me!")