Had my first stab at making a prediction for this year. Thrown a few wild cards in like J Balvin who has a random June date in Berlin apparently which I could see getting extended into a longer mini-tour. I've tried to incorporate as much as I can see that we know, but I'm sure there are some assumptions that I've missed out.
FRIDAY
Pyramid: The 1975 // Central Cee // Scissor Sisters // Alanis Morisette // Teddy Swims // FLO // Gabrielle
Other: Loyle Carner // The Libertines // Tyla // Tom Grennan // Kneecap // JADE // Gigi Perez // Travis
West Holts: FKA Twigs // Chaka Khan // Goat // Doechii // Myles Smith // Ibibio Sound Machine // Fabiana Palladino // MRCY
Woodsies: St. Vincent // Shygirl // Wunderhorse // The Lathums // Sea Girls // CMAT // Good Neighbours // Alfie Templeman // Nell Mescal
Park: Elbow // Amyl and the Sniffers // TBA (Frank Carter and the Sex Pistols) // BERWYN // English Teacher // Horsegirl // Amble // oreglo
SATURDAY
Pyramid: Neil Young // Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds // Wet Leg // Public Enemy // Snow Patrol // The Script // Fatoumata Diawara
Other: Charli XCX // Deftones // Kaiser Chiefs // Griff // Inhaler // Shaboozey // Remi Wolf // Nemzzz
West Holts: J Balvin // Ezra Collective // Bakar // Rizzle Kicks // Lola Young // Mabel // Iniko // Nia Smith
Woodsies: The Wombats // Nova Twins // Olly Alexander // Bob Vylan // Japanese House // Fat Dog // Nieve Ella // Orla Gartland // Gurriers
Park: Kaytranada // Finneas // L'Impératrice // Royel Otis // Nadine Shah // Katy J Pearson // Prima Queen // Bashy
SUNDAY
Pyramid: Olivia Rodrigo // Chappell Roan // Nile Rodgers & Chic // Rod Stewart // Rag'n'Bone Man // Rita Ora // Choir Act
Other: The Prodigy // HAIM // Gracie Abrams // The Darkness // Jorja Smith // James Bay // Hard-Fi // Bears Den
West Holts: Basement Jaxx // Rema // Joy Crookes // 070 Shake // Marcus Miller // SASAMI // Zino Vinci // Nala Sinephro
Woodsies: Chase Atlantic // A Day to Remember // Blossoms // Clairo // beabadoobee // TBA (Sam Fender) // Paris Paloma // Hope Tala // Bradley Simpson
Park: The Maccabees // Laura Marling // Beth Gibbons // Kawala // Magdalena Bay // Sports Team // Amistat // Pentire
That's more than a little spooky. Surely those kind of odds are beyond lottery odds?
If I ever went again, I would (because I have actually thought of this before) make sure there was some dollars kind of on show (to the person doing the massage) on me, but hidden from the guards. Give her the nod, she takes the loot, hides it, and then at the end I make a note of publicly tipping her again. That gets taken off her by the prison officers but she gets to keep the hidden stuff. You can buy what you like from the prison officers.*
* In some of the South American prisons the prisoners are armed with guns and grenades, and occasionally it kicks off between gangs. .
You probably already knew most of all that already.
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