Overheard funnies

[airwaves]

OK, here we go

Whilst stood at the milk and sugar table in the Tiny Tea Tent.

Girl points to bowl of dark brown sugar and asks server "Is that coconut nectar?"

WTF is coconut nectar?

[pjadnoo]

Heard walking past my tent:

"And so, I looked at her, and she was covered in mayonnaise. Being the gentleman, I told her 'you've got mayo on you'."

I can only assume that mayonnaise wasn't a euphemism.

 

 

[chazwwe]

'So what and where is the pyamid stage' - bottom of Kidney Mead. 

[harryy]

1 minute ago, chazwwe said:

'So what and where is the pyamid stage' - bottom of Kidney Mead. 

WOW LOL

[alibear]

Walking past a food stall called Moonie Halloumi, up by Leftfield, I think: 

"Moonie Halloumi; what a great name for whatever the fuck that place sells..."

[Hugh Jass]

"Do they have a Maccy D's here?"

[kalifire]

In the long drops...

"Lou Lou?

LOU?!

LOUISE REDMAN!! I'M BEING SICK!!"

No idea quite why it tickled me so much but I had a good chuckle whilst letting one go. 

[pie_and_a_pint]

I've just seen a bloke wearing a tshirt that says:

SURELY NOT EVERYBODY WAS KUNG FU FIGHTING?

[Doug85]

Not overheard as such but a brilliant flag- a picture of Theresa May and a wheat field in the background with the caption "naughty".

Genius 

[Helephantelope]

Walking past the rabbit hole, heard a lass behind me say "Wow, look - there's a playboy tent!" 

[Matt42]

Anything said by a scouser

cant wait for the annual thread, but I'm gonna say it anyway

lots of scousers

[SpiralGirl]

Ahh, my favourite thread of the year :-)

[EamerRed]

2 hours ago, Matt42 said:

Anything said by a scouser

cant wait for the annual thread, but I'm gonna say it anyway

lots of scousers

I've noticed this! Fooking everywhere

[JamboNelly]

At Park stage before Mark Lanegan.

Lady to her partner-

"so what sort of music Elbow play?"

"mm hard to say. It's good for doing the dishes to"

[airwaves]

In the middle of the field for Radiohead, about an hour in 

Lady to her fellow "I could have been at Dizee Rascal instead of this shit! I can't dance. And I'm not drunk! "

Mind you,  seeing the comments on the Radiohead thread I can probably understand why ;-) 

[K2SO]

9 hours ago, Doug85 said:

Not overheard as such but a brilliant flag- a picture of Theresa May and a wheat field in the background with the caption "naughty".

Genius 

I am camped about 4 tents from them 

[General Lee]

11 hours ago, Hugh Jass said:

"Do they have a Maccy D's here?"

 I suppose everyone has to start somewhere. 

[Jackomanaco]

Just heard someone in the tent next to me ask Siri if a pringles can, can hold urine! Made me chuckle 

[laurasaurus]

Overheard by Mr. Saurus:

"So, were you alone or by yourself?"

"Yeah."

[GrumpyRaver]

18 hours ago, Matt42 said:

Anything said by a scouser

cant wait for the annual thread, but I'm gonna say it anyway

lots of scousers

I wristbanded more people from Liverpool than anywhere else on Wednesday. And a security guard at gate told me on shift this morning that the vast majority of people trying to get in on fake tickets and wristbands are scousers too...

[char90]

A guy emerged from a random hedge near the park last night shrieking 'IS THIS THE RABBIT HOLE' 

[hfuhruhurr]

Tent next to me, two girls talking about boyfriends-  "we were doing sex when he tried putting it up me butt, well I said, we're splitting up if you do that. He did anyway. " other girl "was that roger"

[airwaves]

Randomly walking 

Lad to his mum 

"Are they singing 'i want to live like the coloured people '? "

Mum "No. It's common people dear"

[DownboundTrain52]

Overhead at Radiohead, at the end, from three coked up teenage girls;

"Aw, wish they'd played their hit!" 

"Oh year, which one is that?" 

"Better Off Alone! Only Radiohead song I like! Absolute turd guzzlers."

I honestly had no words, and nor did the couple I was with. We all just snorted and desperately tried to not laugh further when they fell into one of the oil drum bins a minute later. 

[Adystar]

Woman stood in front of the other stage" is this the pyramid stage?"

friend"yes,thought it would be more pointy though"