How do you feel?

[Bisque]

Watching the sun set

[northernringo]

57 minutes ago, crazyfool1 said:

any update ?

Not home just yet as he had a bit of a set-back yesterday - he lost all feeling/movement in one of his legs and could move his arm but was very weak. It was quite a worrying day.

Thankfully today he was able to move his leg again which gave him a great boost. Obviously very weak but that can be worked on hopefully. They did another CT Scan today and no sign of changes from the one he had earlier in the week which is also encouraging.

Probably in for at least a few more days but today was definitely a better day than yesterday  

[funkychick2007]

1 hour ago, northernringo said:

Not home just yet as he had a bit of a set-back yesterday - he lost all feeling/movement in one of his legs and could move his arm but was very weak. It was quite a worrying day.

Thankfully today he was able to move his leg again which gave him a great boost. Obviously very weak but that can be worked on hopefully. They did another CT Scan today and no sign of changes from the one he had earlier in the week which is also encouraging.

Probably in for at least a few more days but today was definitely a better day than yesterday  

Upvoted first being a better day today for your dad! 
Fills me with hope my mum was taken into hospital today non coronavirus related! 
the NHS are being amazing trying to balance everything and do everything safely! 
back along on this forum I was called a narcissist for clapping on a Thursday! Tomorrow I will be clapping even louder Thank you for every keyworker the ones who I know and the ones I don’t! 🌈💙👏🏻 And I don’t give a dam what anyone thinks!! 

[Wellyboot]

9 hours ago, funkychick2007 said:

Upvoted first being a better day today for your dad! 
Fills me with hope my mum was taken into hospital today non coronavirus related! 
the NHS are being amazing trying to balance everything and do everything safely! 
back along on this forum I was called a narcissist for clapping on a Thursday! Tomorrow I will be clapping even louder Thank you for every keyworker the ones who I know and the ones I don’t! 🌈💙👏🏻 And I don’t give a dam what anyone thinks!! 

Sending lots of love to you FC, I hope mum is ok!!! X

[Crazyfool01]

9 hours ago, funkychick2007 said:

Upvoted first being a better day today for your dad! 
Fills me with hope my mum was taken into hospital today non coronavirus related! 
the NHS are being amazing trying to balance everything and do everything safely! 
back along on this forum I was called a narcissist for clapping on a Thursday! Tomorrow I will be clapping even louder Thank you for every keyworker the ones who I know and the ones I don’t! 🌈💙👏🏻 And I don’t give a dam what anyone thinks!! 

I bash my pots and pans every Thursday ... some aren’t keen but I like to show my appreciation somehow ... as well as other ways too ... I can also do it with a clear conscience that I didn’t vote in the current party ... I’m suprised at the person calling you that ... it’s a personal decision 

[vintagelaureate]

Take care @funkychick2007 x

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

5 hours ago, crazyfool1 said:

I bash my pots and pans every Thursday 

Euphemism?

[Crazyfool01]

1 minute ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Euphemism?

only if you want it to be  

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

42 minutes ago, crazyfool1 said:

only if you want it to be  

Nicely batted back to me crazyfool1. Well, I guess I did ask for that. 

[kalifire]

Some great advice on here that's really helping.

Today marks one week since she broke the news. A week ago today, I was completely broken, and in a world of hurt and pain that was intense, relentless and didn't stop for about 72 hours. Functioning was almost impossible. It was on the Sunday night I built up the courage to search for somewhere else to live that seems to have been a bit of a game changer. It helped me to have an alternative focus instead of only dwelling on the loss with no direction or structure.

A week on, and I seem to have settled into a bit of a pattern. I flip between being OK, and having a set back. The times I'm OK are when I'm imagining the future, developing plans (want to focus on health and learn how to cook) and talking with the two or three people who are directly available to me for support (albeit from overseas). The set backs are when I'm in the flat and she's struggling, or my mind throws memories at me and the loss is all too apparent again.

I'm pretty sure that moving into a new place ASAP is going to have a positive effect. It's very hard not to think about love and loss when I'm literally living with the subject of it. Although I'm dreading the day I close the door to a home without her in it after five years, the lack of a constant reminder, and the focus of setting up somewhere fresh is surely going to put a rocket under moving on, right?

I've found a place just one road back from where I live now, so I'd stay in the area. She's looking for places about a half hour drive away, so she's not accessible without a bit of faffing around, and perhaps that's for the best. I'm still getting through one day at a time, but perhaps there are slightly more OK moments as time goes on, and that's not a bad sign.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

26 minutes ago, kalifire said:

Some great advice on here that's really helping.

Today marks one week since she broke the news. A week ago today, I was completely broken, and in a world of hurt and pain that was intense, relentless and didn't stop for about 72 hours. Functioning was almost impossible. It was on the Sunday night I built up the courage to search for somewhere else to live that seems to have been a bit of a game changer. It helped me to have an alternative focus instead of only dwelling on the loss with no direction or structure.

A week on, and I seem to have settled into a bit of a pattern. I flip between being OK, and having a set back. The times I'm OK are when I'm imagining the future, developing plans (want to focus on health and learn how to cook) and talking with the two or three people who are directly available to me for support (albeit from overseas). The set backs are when I'm in the flat and she's struggling, or my mind throws memories at me and the loss is all too apparent again.

I'm pretty sure that moving into a new place ASAP is going to have a positive effect. It's very hard not to think about love and loss when I'm literally living with the subject of it. Although I'm dreading the day I close the door to a home without her in it after five years, the lack of a constant reminder, and the focus of setting up somewhere fresh is surely going to put a rocket under moving on, right?

I've found a place just one road back from where I live now, so I'd stay in the area. She's looking for places about a half hour drive away, so she's not accessible without a bit of faffing around, and perhaps that's for the best. I'm still getting through one day at a time, but perhaps there are slightly more OK moments as time goes on, and that's not a bad sign.

It's only been a week, so you'll still get those raw moments from time to time. However, as time goes on they'll get more infrequent and less harsh. However, it'll still be a case of one day at a time for a while. I think it;'s very positive that you are searching for a new place to live, thinking about your health, and also taking an interest in learning to cook. I was going to say previously that maybe taking on a hobby or interesting activity might help, and I think that cooking will tick that box. 

It's also a positive thing that you will both be a little bit away from each other when you do get new accommodation. It may not seem it right now, but that distance will eventually be a tonic rather than a curse.

As it's still so fresh, you'll still have those times when you think negatively about the situation, and feel a sense of loss. I think that's only natural or otherwise it would mean that you never cared for the lady. However, I'd advise trying to limit and curtail these moments as best you can, and replace them with more moments of what do you do now, what do you now want from life, what can you learn. If I learnt one thing from when my last girlfriend left me, it was that negatively going over the same stuff over and over again in circles, didn't help me one bit.

As ever, wishing you all the best.

 

[Wellyboot]

Sending thoughts your way x you will get there and hopefully the move will the best start to your new chapter

 

[funkychick2007]

Sending lots of positive thoughts to keep going through the days to move forward! Old memories get stored away In a place but this creates time and space for future happiness and new experiences! Let us know how you get on with the cooking!!! 

[O'Doyle Rules]

Online dating is going to explode when we're let loose again - there are lots of lovely people out there ready for you to focus your feelings on!

Edited May 14, 2020 by O'Doyle Rules

[Crazyfool01]

11 minutes ago, O'Doyle Rules said:

Online dating is going to explode when we're let loose again - there are lots of lovely people out there ready for you to focus your feelings on!

Bloody hope so 

[funkychick2007]

Thank you for all your positive thoughts! My mum is out of hospital and back at home!! 👍🏻
hope your Dad is continuing to improve Northern Ringo! 
🌈💙

[kalifire]

3 hours ago, funkychick2007 said:

Thank you for all your positive thoughts! My mum is out of hospital and back at home!! 👍🏻
hope your Dad is continuing to improve Northern Ringo! 
🌈💙

Fantastic to hear, fc

[northernringo]

On 5/15/2020 at 4:02 PM, funkychick2007 said:

Thank you for all your positive thoughts! My mum is out of hospital and back at home!! 👍🏻
hope your Dad is continuing to improve Northern Ringo! 
🌈💙

Arrived back home on Friday evening

Has some good days and some bad days but the long road to recover has started well, hopefully he'll regain a little more independence each day/week.

[Crazyfool01]

2 minutes ago, northernringo said:

Arrived back home on Friday evening

Has some good days and some bad days but the long road to recover has started well, hopefully he'll regain a little more independence each day/week.

Excellent news and the worry of hospitalisation and cv19 will start to subside .. 

[Wellyboot]

On ‎5‎/‎15‎/‎2020 at 4:02 PM, funkychick2007 said:

Thank you for all your positive thoughts! My mum is out of hospital and back at home!! 👍🏻
hope your Dad is continuing to improve Northern Ringo! 
🌈💙

 

23 minutes ago, northernringo said:

Arrived back home on Friday evening

Has some good days and some bad days but the long road to recover has started well, hopefully he'll regain a little more independence each day/week.

That is fantastic news, both of you!!  I'm so so happy your mum and dad are back home x

[Crazyfool01]

Shit news to wake up to today ... diabetes breakdown giving the type 1s as higher risk ... really not wanting to get reclassified in the shielding group ... I can’t be staying in indefinitely  what an absolute load of bollocks from the bbc ... more help for diabetics apparently .... where on earth is this going to come from ? like those nhs hospitals no doubt .....Im still awaiting my consultant appointment that was due in sept  

Edited May 20, 2020 by crazyfool1

[WestCountryGirl]

2 hours ago, crazyfool1 said:

Shit news to wake up to today ... diabetes breakdown giving the type 1s as higher risk ... really not wanting to get reclassified in the shielding group ... I can’t be staying in indefinitely  what an absolute load of bollocks from the bbc ... more help for diabetics apparently .... where on earth is this going to come from ? like those nhs hospitals no doubt .....Im still awaiting my consultant appointment that was due in sept  

You were my first thought when I saw that news this morning. I'm sorry you're having to go through all this uncertainty. I hope you get some good information and support with this soon.

[Crazyfool01]

21 minutes ago, WestCountryGirl said:

You were my first thought when I saw that news this morning. I'm sorry you're having to go through all this uncertainty. I hope you get some good information and support with this soon.

thankyou ... the positives on it are that I can control my own destiny to some extent ... nobody on that survey under 50 has died and my blood sugar control is excellent so that works in my favour .... Im also not obese although ive put on a few kgs in lockdown so now some extra incentive to reduce my carbohydrate intake and up the exercise ... this is also quite reassuring 

 

Edited May 20, 2020 by crazyfool1

[kalifire]

9 hours ago, crazyfool1 said:

Shit news to wake up to today ... diabetes breakdown giving the type 1s as higher risk ... really not wanting to get reclassified in the shielding group ... I can’t be staying in indefinitely  what an absolute load of bollocks from the bbc ... more help for diabetics apparently .... where on earth is this going to come from ? like those nhs hospitals no doubt .....Im still awaiting my consultant appointment that was due in sept  

Ah, mate. That's not ideal news. So sorry to hear that. Just remember that 'news' is rarely that, these days. Much of it is speculative, third hand and not an accurate state of affairs. Surveys are generally nothing to get alarmed over.

[Crazyfool01]

6 minutes ago, kalifire said:

Ah, mate. That's not ideal news. So sorry to hear that. Just remember that 'news' is rarely that, these days. Much of it is speculative, third hand and not an accurate state of affairs. Surveys are generally nothing to get alarmed over.

Yep see later posts ... it’s a slightly better state of affairs ..  it’s all part of that roller coaster ... lots to do with age factor still ..