Peeing your pants

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

20 minutes ago, StoneCircle said:

An upgrade to a large bottle might be a good idea! 😂

 

You can get bigger than that;

 

 

A little impractical for walking around with, but possibly ideal if you are going to stay at the front of the Pyramid all day, drinking your way through sets.

[Mardy]

My cousin shat in a lad's sleeping bag in Kidney Mead in 1995, cos he'd sold us sh*t drugs that didn't work.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

1 minute ago, Mardy said:

My cousin shat in a lad's sleeping bag in Kidney Mead in 1995, cos he'd sold us sh*t drugs that didn't work.

 

f**k!!!!!!!!!!!

[Neville Street]

 

12 minutes ago, Mardy said:

My cousin shat in a lad's sleeping bag in Kidney Mead in 1995, cos he'd sold us sh*t drugs that didn't work.

My friend woke to find a sh*t in the porch of his tent in the 90s. He wasn’t a dealer so I think it’s a separate incident 😅

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

9 minutes ago, Neville Street said:

 

My friend woke to find a sh*t in the porch of his tent in the 90s. He wasn’t a dealer so I think it’s a separate incident 😅

 

I hate it when that happens!

[Ayrshire Chris]

12 hours ago, Mardy said:

My cousin shat in a lad's sleeping bag in Kidney Mead in 1995, cos he'd sold us sh*t drugs that didn't work.

Sounds fair justice to me 

[MEGATRONICMEATWAGON]

15 hours ago, Mardy said:

My cousin shat in a lad's sleeping bag in Kidney Mead in 1995, cos he'd sold us sh*t drugs that didn't work.

 

This reminds me of a friend visiting Reading for the first time in 2005, woke up next to a human turd. No one knows who it was from or why, but the story has become a consistent anecdote in our group of friends ever since. 

 

EDIT: I should add, said friend never returned to Reading again.

Edited April 21 by MEGATRONICMEATWAGON

[Neil]

my wife calls metal "sh*t in your handbag music" maybe it should be sh*t in your tent music.

[philipsteak]

1 hour ago, MEGATRONICMEATWAGON said:

 

This reminds me of a friend visiting Reading for the first time in 2005, woke up next to a human turd. No one knows who it was from or why, but the story has become a consistent anecdote in our group of friends ever since. 

 

EDIT: I should add, said friend never returned to Reading again.

 

The town or the festival?

[rubenz]

All this piss chat has reminded my of walking out of the festival last year and seeing a big pile of piss filled plastic bottles that must have been retrieved by the clean up team to prevent it going in to the land. If you do go in a bottle make sure to empty it in the toilets the next day!

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

4 minutes ago, rubenz said:

All this piss chat has reminded my of walking out of the festival last year and seeing a big pile of piss filled plastic bottles that must have been retrieved by the clean up team to prevent it going in to the land. If you do go in a bottle make sure to empty it in the toilets the next day!

 

Only scum leave bottles like that around.

[MEGATRONICMEATWAGON]

1 hour ago, philipsteak said:

 

The town or the festival?

 

For the purpose of the anecdote, both would work out fine. 

[MEGATRONICMEATWAGON]

1 hour ago, Neil said:

my wife calls metal "sh*t in your handbag music" maybe it should be sh*t in your tent music.

 

That's quite a brilliant summary, lol. It's not quite clear if it's even a positive or negative.

 

Indie music - "Crapping in a yurt music"

[One Tonne Baby]

Not actually peed myself but I was determined not to miss any of Paul McCartney so didn’t really have any booze until just before he came on. The moment he did I felt a need to pee. 

Ive always felt embarrassed and ashamed (cos it is disgusts) peeing in a cup but decided that if I need to then I would. An hour later I’m desperate and starting to scan the floor for cups - nothing. Every act I’ve ever seen at the pyramid in treading on hundreds of cups. Nothing.

so i essentially am desperate for the set to end. But it goes on and one and I’m enjoying the songs but half hating it. The encore allows me another search and I find a cup. I wait and wait until I can no longer and start going and feel it dripping out - a hole. I tense everything and stop. I find another cup and can feel it getting to the top so quickly throw it down then go again. By the time the set finishes I need another one and we are standing in an emptying field hysterically laughing and passing this cup round.

all night I was pissing every 5 minutes. Think I did some serious damage 

[MEGATRONICMEATWAGON]

2 minutes ago, One Tonne Baby said:

Not actually peed myself but I was determined not to miss any of Paul McCartney so didn’t really have any booze until just before he came on. The moment he did I felt a need to pee. 

Ive always felt embarrassed and ashamed (cos it is disgusts) peeing in a cup but decided that if I need to then I would. An hour later I’m desperate and starting to scan the floor for cups - nothing. Every act I’ve ever seen at the pyramid in treading on hundreds of cups. Nothing.

so i essentially am desperate for the set to end. But it goes on and one and I’m enjoying the songs but half hating it. The encore allows me another search and I find a cup. I wait and wait until I can no longer and start going and feel it dripping out - a hole. I tense everything and stop. I find another cup and can feel it getting to the top so quickly throw it down then go again. By the time the set finishes I need another one and we are standing in an emptying field hysterically laughing and passing this cup round.

all night I was pissing every 5 minutes. Think I did some serious damage 

 

How much ket had you done before Paul came on? Lol.

[Ayrshire Chris]

The bar steward sons of Va Doonican, appearing on the Avalon this year, have a song dedicated to festival peeing, called Walking in Manpiss. Well worth a listen! 

[Spindles]

8 hours ago, MEGATRONICMEATWAGON said:

 

This reminds me of a friend visiting Reading for the first time in 2005, woke up next to a human turd. No one knows who it was from or why, but the story has become a consistent anecdote in our group of friends ever since. 

 

EDIT: I should add, said friend never returned to Reading again.

I have only been to Reading once in 2008, and on waking up on the second day there were laid 2 enormous turds.  Each was identical in every way and they were laid side by side and perfectly parallel like the worlds worst tramlines. 

 

My neighbour at that festival happened to be, of all people, Andrew Kerr, who was an absolute gent all weekend supplying me with coffee and anecdotes whenever we were hanging around the tent.  Although I never queried it, I've always believed it was him who removed the monstrosities as that was absolutely the kind of behaviour he demonstrated all weekend.

[Superscally]

7 hours ago, Neil said:

my wife calls metal "sh*t in your handbag music" maybe it should be sh*t in your tent music.

In Kidney Mead once I did walk past a group of lads sat outside a tent, offering people 20 quid to go in and sh*t in their mate's tent...

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

44 minutes ago, Superscally said:

In Kidney Mead once I did walk past a group of lads sat outside a tent, offering people 20 quid to go in and sh*t in their mate's tent...

 

I'm glad that I have mates whose humour lies elsewhere. 

[Superscally]

9 hours ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

 

I'm glad that I have mates whose humour lies elsewhere. 

Grim, isn't it? I think I'd take my stuff out, buy a new tent, direct security to where they were and never speak to them ever again. 

[goldfishboy]

friends, please don't piss on the ground. it pollutes the land, which is bad for the wildlife and endangers the festival's future. the toilets may seem far but you can make it there, i believe in you.

[e_p]

Pringles tubes work equally fine 

Edited May 24 by e_p

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

21 minutes ago, e_p said:

Pringles tubes work equally fine 

 

I'd have to choose a screw topped container over a slip on plastic lidded container. The opportunity for it to all go wrong is much greater with a slip on, I'd say. It might make for some great slap(iss)stick comedy, though. In addition, I think there might be a chance that one would actually be in such a state as to think the Pringles tube that contained liquid, was your pint, and then proceed to drink some of it. 

[Guest]

9 hours ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

 

I'd have to choose a screw topped container over a slip on plastic lidded container. The opportunity for it to all go wrong is much greater with a slip on, I'd say. It might make for some great slap(iss)stick comedy, though. In addition, I think there might be a chance that one would actually be in such a state as to think the Pringles tube that contained liquid, was your pint, and then proceed to drink some of it. 

At least you would get to 'enjoy' your alcohol twice.

[CanWeRest]

This thread! 😳😳😳