singles thread

[Lithium05]

Time to lower the tone I reckon.... so here's a song that roughly sums up my current predicament.

My last girlfriend didn't like me thought she might be

Most likely a dyke she just didn't excite me

Lefty? Yeah but that was alright

She was hotter than the sun but she just wasn't that bright

My mistake she was more flaky than a leper colony

I think a wooden clothespin would have been much better company

Ass like a donkey acting funky gave her "L" now she's a flunky

So my love for her died quicker than a batch of Sea Monkeys

Early bird gets the worm spread your legs or spread the word

So what if I'm not the smartest peanut in the turd

I'm white which goes with everything but I can come in any color

And I'm looking for the kind of girl that reminds me of my mother

But it's hard to find a girl with a viper tattooed on her tushy

And how many girls do you know that can play the harmonica with their pussies?

Like em' easy and hot and sweet like a Rice Krispie Treat, gee

You know what I really want in a girl?

Me

I need to find a new vagina

Any kind of new vagina

It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina

Calvin Klein? kinda North Carolina?

Women are like dog, doo, hear me through don't interrupt

It's just the older that they are the easier they get to pick-up

I'd fill the generation gap clean the cobwebs from her rafters

Old hens would rather put out than be put out to the pasture

No age just ain't a gauge I like my girls like my cheese

Preferably for me fat-free American singles only

I want my next chick anorexic, the winner is the thinner

Won't have to take her skinny ass out to a fancy dinner

Like Sizzler she got a beef we'll chew the fat

If I forget to put the seat up I can put up with her crap

Let her lash out and crack the whip but not in bed I don't play rough

No I can't be tied down with a girl that wants me tied up

Just independent like NOFX ,smart like Janeane Garafolo

She'd use big words to make fun of me so that I would never know

Bestow upon me all her wisdom of the Dewey Decimal System, gee

You know what I really want in a girl?

Me

Edited November 20, 2009 by Lithium05

[Glitter+Vodka]

its probably the personality

[rabid]

Where's the moderation in this thread?!...ah well

[parTy animal]

Ur always so mean to me

[ampersand]

'Be mean to keep 'em keen' as they say

[parTy animal]

you definitely going to paramore btw?

[ampersand]

Aye, heard my gf got you a seating ticket Should be easy enough to sneak you in the standing area though.

Cant wait to see Hayley

[parTy animal]

just glad it were no too much above face better not be full of 15 year old lassies though!

[-pogo-]

It will be You can blame the bloody twilight soundtrack for that

[ampersand]

It will be You can blame the bloody twilight soundtrack for that

[Glitter+Vodka]

'Be mean to keep 'em keen' as they say

[Paul ™]

Glitter is a winner... you all lose!

[rabid]

Glitter is a winner... you all lose!

[minute5072]

Sorry, but I've already won!

[rabid]

Straight red!

[krisskross]

meh. given the, not so cryptc with google, yellow carnation... or im an over complicated mad as a box of frogs loon

Edited November 23, 2009 by krisskross

[brighteyes]

Down on page three, rubbish!

My sister just got engaged, yay wedding!!!

[rabid]

Down on page three, rubbish!

My sister just got engaged, yay bridesmaids!!

[brighteyes]

[Cardboard Box City]

[Glitter+Vodka]

I'm a bridesmaid next year, can't wait.

[Cardboard Box City]

I'm a bridesmaid next year, can't wait.

[Glitter+Vodka]

The bride is nice

[Cardboard Box City]

The bride is nice

[Glitter+Vodka]

Ego...