singles thread

[dakyras]

Cats are evil, vindictive little f**kers who prey on the weak minded. I hate them - they're ugly, they're sly, they're dirty, they're just horrible things.

[minute5072]

Sounds like you've had a bad cat experience in the past.

[mynameisearl]

Haha thats true, however seeing as I had to stop and spew in the pub on the way to the game, I dont think I was in optimum pulling condition!! Was literally green with my hangover. I did see a couple of very hot St Mirren fans on the walk up tho!

Was my bro out at Paddys after the match?

[brighteyes]

Hot office girl is driving me crazy... she's so hot I nearly licked her neck when I was standing behind her today. We exchange emails with each other all day at work, mostly talking about food... we both like food a lot. I try to get some innuendoes into these emails, like the other day I managed to say "you'll have to squeeze some vegetables in between your jammy dodgers". But still she has not succumbed to my charms! I'd like to succumb on her charms.

Arrrrggghhh I want her so bad!!!

[Glitter+Vodka]

How is a classy bird like you still single?

[Snufflebutt]

Hot office girl is driving me crazy... she's so hot I nearly licked her neck when I was standing behind her today. We exchange emails with each other all day at work, mostly talking about food... we both like food a lot. I try to get some innuendoes into these emails, like the other day I managed to say "you'll have to squeeze some vegetables in between your jammy dodgers". But still she has not succumbed to my charms! I'd like to succumb on her charms.

Arrrrggghhh I want her so bad!!!

[-pogo-]

Hot office girl is driving me crazy... she's so hot I nearly licked her neck when I was standing behind her today. We exchange emails with each other all day at work, mostly talking about food... we both like food a lot. I try to get some innuendoes into these emails, like the other day I managed to say "you'll have to squeeze some vegetables in between your jammy dodgers". But still she has not succumbed to my charms! I'd like to succumb on her charms.

Arrrrggghhh I want her so bad!!!

[amy246]

Ask her for a meal then, cos it links in with the food, either find somewhere new and ask if she wants to try it out with you or somewhere you know is good where hopefully she might not have been just to show her.

[ampersand]

Ask her for a meal then, cos it links in with the food, either find somewhere new and ask if she wants to try it out with you or somewhere you know is good where hopefully she might not have been just to show her.

[Langdale Wolf]

but he can't put his willy into her in the restaurant. what a silly suggestion

[ampersand]

hows this being on page 3 going to help anyone??!!

how are you meant to ask someone out that you only know through them working in lidl? if it was asda or tesco it would be easier as they're always busy, but lidl's really quiet, though there's always someone around at the checkout. don't want to come off as a complete tit seen as she might already be with someone.

probably never going to happen lol

[Langdale Wolf]

hows this being on page 3 going to help anyone??!!

how are you meant to ask someone out that you only know through them working in lidl? if it was asda or tesco it would be easier as they're always busy, but lidl's really quiet, though there's always someone around at the checkout. don't want to come off as a complete tit seen as she might already be with someone.

probably never going to happen lol

[ampersand]

Buy some peas, and spell out something crude on the checkout using them.

Very romantic.

[Langdale Wolf]

what use are you? i only ever buy apple juice, irn bru, scotch eggs, chocolate or beer!

[//ross]

He could drill a hole in his plate, put his willy through the plate and ask her to play with his food.

I recommend spag bol for such a trick. I'm not talking from experience, mind. Not since the Pot Noodle debacle.

[Katster]

My bloke wrote "I love you" on the bathroom mirror so it appeared in the steam when I had a shower.

He never ever ever does anything soppy like that. He must have been pissed.

I had a shower the other day and wrote "too" at the bottom of what he'd wrote

[Goblinz]

hows this being on page 3 going to help anyone??!!

how are you meant to ask someone out that you only know through them working in lidl? if it was asda or tesco it would be easier as they're always busy, but lidl's really quiet, though there's always someone around at the checkout. don't want to come off as a complete tit seen as she might already be with someone.

probably never going to happen lol

[strudders]

My bloke wrote "I love you" on the bathroom mirror so it appeared in the steam when I had a shower.

He never ever ever does anything soppy like that. He must have been pissed.

I had a shower the other day and wrote "too" at the bottom of what he'd wrote

[Katster]

Ahhhhhhhh

At least it did not say

"Sorry love peed in the shower best wash it first...."

[Cardboard Box City]

Ahhhhhhhh

[ampersand]

Can't you stalk her on facebook and find out her relationship status?

[ampersand]

[Goblinz]

nope, that's how useless i am, i don't even know her name

plus i don't think writing her first name and lidl into google would get me anywhere

[Katster]

Whatever you do ampersand don't ask her out in person, just as a customer. Get to know her first if you're going to do that.

I've had random blokes ask me out in Tosco before now and it's embarrassing and just makes you think "weirdo".

It also doesn't help when they come in shopping the week after with their wife and kids.

[ampersand]

Maybe follow her to her car and get her reg plate then see if the DVLA can give you details of the registered owner.

...