Interview advice please

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

I think sometimes it comes down to ultimatums - the parent tries to shock the child into backing down - 'while you're in our house you'll live by our rules' sort of thing, and it escalates past the point of no return. It's really sad.

[feral chile]

I think a lot of it does come down to ultimatums, along side with the ego thing already suggested. I remember the moment my dad threw me out of the house. He did it because he had lost power and couldn't cope with it on a daily basis any longer. But that wasn't that he'd lost power over me, it was that there was nothing within his ability to stop my alcoholic decline (at the time). He threw me out because he couldn't watch. In my case it was the right thing to do. I suspect (can't remember) that I was a little hurt at the time but eventually I was able to see why he had done what he did. It was nothing to do with disowning me. I just thought I'd share my experience so as to explain that there can be a lot more to parents kicking their kids out than one may initially conclude.

Edited February 8, 2012 by feral chile

[Rufus Gwertigan]

I think a lot of it does come down to ultimatums, along side with the ego thing already suggested. I remember the moment my dad threw me out of the house. He did it because he had lost power and couldn't cope with it on a daily basis any longer. But that wasn't that he'd lost power over me, it was that there was nothing within his ability to stop my alcoholic decline (at the time). He threw me out because he couldn't watch. In my case it was the right thing to do. I suspect (can't remember) that I was a little hurt at the time but eventually I was able to see why he had done what he did. It was nothing to do with disowning me. I just thought I'd share my experience so as to explain that there can be a lot more to parents kicking their kids out than one may initially conclude.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

My daughter made a drama for herself that nearly left her out on her ear with me. I wont go into the argument but it ended with me telling her to get out of my way whilst I calmed down and decide what she wants out of living with me, either living in a family home or something as a stop gap. After that all I got were text messages rather than a conversation. Eventually she sent a text saying "I will get my stuff and move out". I just replied fine if thats the way she wants it. I had not even mentioned it. Before I knew it I was getting text messages from her bitch of a mother saying I had thrown her out on the streets blah blah blah. To but to the chase she ende up ringing me to ask he she could come home. I said that I never said she couldn't but she pointed out that I had not contacted her to say come home or dont go. I put the ball firmly in her court. I dont piss about with mind games and emotional blackmail. I dont use kicking them out as a threat. I am yesy laid back at home. I have 2 rules. One is on smoking and the other is they take the responsibility for their friends/guests in the house. Mind you they know now that anything I may threaten with is not an idle threat. My eldest moved out to in to Uni in 2010. His room has always been a mess with shit everywhere. I have him a stack of boxes and asked him to put in everything that he wanted me to store for him as I would be taking over the bedroom. He made a crap effort and each holiday he came home I would ask him to sort the stuff otherwise anything not boxed will get thrown. Now nearly 16 months later it took 3 of us over 2 hours to clear the room of crap. My son is not happy because I have thrown absolutely loads away or sent to charity. As promised everything boxed is stored so I assume it was important, anything else was crap. Mind you the kids have learned to take me at my word.

[kaosmark2]

Although I'm not a parent (so probably haven't got a clue) I do wonder why it is that parents want their kids rooms to be clean and tidy. As long as the door is shut and you can't see the bomb site in there, what does it matter? Is it because it's emblematic of a haphazard approach to life which you don't want them to adhere to or is it simply down to parents not liking 'shit' thrown around everywhere?

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

I wasn't particularly pointing the finger at Rufus. His post did get me thinking about some adults in general though, and that's why I asked the question. As you say, Rufus has already explained that he had a particular reason for wanting the room cleaned.

[Rufus Gwertigan]

I wasn't particularly pointing the finger at Rufus. His post did get me thinking about some adults in general though, and that's why I asked the question. As you say, Rufus has already explained that he had a particular reason for wanting the room cleaned.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

Dammed if you do and dammed if you don't. No, not an enviable position to find oneself in. I never even thought about how it could be viewed by Social Services etc. I did say I probably didn't have a clue!

[kaosmark2]

Dammed if you do and dammed if you don't. No, not an enviable position to find oneself in. I never even thought about how it could be viewed by Social Services etc. I did say I probably didn't have a clue!

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

Not sure what you mean - how often what's relevant?

Do you think your mom was having a nosey about or that she just couldn't help herself 'tidying' things in an OCD kind of a way?

[kaosmark2]

Not sure what you mean - how often what's relevant?

Do you think your mom was having a nosey about or that she just couldn't help herself 'tidying' things in an OCD kind of a way?

[Rufus Gwertigan]

To get back on topic I had to do an assessment online for the job I am applying for. Its was made up of maths, English and logic tests. Maths is a real strength of mine but I just know I have failed.

[feral chile]

To get back on topic I had to do an assessment online for the job I am applying for. Its was made up of maths, English and logic tests. Maths is a real strength of mine but I just know I have failed.

Edited February 24, 2012 by feral chile

[Rufus Gwertigan]

I hate those maths tests - I just did one, and I'm just too slow. I did get through it, and through the verbal reasoning, which seems to be the one everyone else struggles with but I feel very confident with, but I didn't get through the workstyle questionnaire. I don't think I did well in the maths, and I think that probably pulled down my overall score.

hope you have better luck.

[feral chile]

I have got through to the interview stage even though I know I did terrible on the test. However it is probable that I am the best of a bad bunch?

I am starting to get a little nervous now even though the interviews are not for 6 weeks. It looks like they are interviewing a few hundred for the place I want to work. It is a little weird as this is how things seem to snowball with me. I apply for something, that I would not have thought of, just to see how far I can take it, as well as application experience, and then end up with the job.

[Gre]

I've been keeping this quiet until it all went through & I handed my resignation in.... I've been offered a job in London starting after Easter Very excited, very nervous, just need to sort out a place to live!

[feral chile]

I've been keeping this quiet until it all went through & I handed my resignation in.... I've been offered a job in London starting after Easter Very excited, very nervous, just need to sort out a place to live!

[Rufus Gwertigan]

My apprenticeship went tits up when I realised that they wanted me to work in Warrington. Fuck that for a game of soldiers. Don't mind getting up mega early, but to then travel to Warrington .

Anyway, glad I did not do it. I have been offered an opportunity more in line with my studies and my long term goal. It is to work as an "Appropriate Adult". Only voluntary, even after training, but with the counselling that I do for a charity at the moment I am building up a rather good looking CV for when I finish my BSc next year.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

My apprenticeship went tits up when I realised that they wanted me to work in Warrington. Fuck that for a game of soldiers. Don't mind getting up mega early, but to then travel to Warrington .

Anyway, glad I did not do it. I have been offered an opportunity more in line with my studies and my long term goal. It is to work as an "Appropriate Adult". Only voluntary, even after training, but with the counselling that I do for a charity at the moment I am building up a rather good looking CV for when I finish my BSc next year.

[Rufus Gwertigan]

I am on the look for just a low level office or factory job. I have had to put any studies on hold for a bit after my strokes but my agency work is dreadful. But I am finding it really difficult pitching a CV at the right level for the jobs I am after. Essentially low responsibility jobs.

[feral chile]

I am on the look for just a low level office or factory job. I have had to put any studies on hold for a bit after my strokes but my agency work is dreadful. But I am finding it really difficult pitching a CV at the right level for the jobs I am after. Essentially low responsibility jobs.

[Paul ™]

Had an interview this morning for a job I would really love to do, and fits in with my career progression, and had about 4-5 days to prepare for it.

I had to do a 10 minute presentation and then was asked questions. I rehearsed the presentation and felt that that it went well considering not done anything like that at an interview before, the only presentations I have done were small ones in front of work colleagues.

Despite all my preparation for the type of questions they would ask, the ones I got presented with threw me and I feel I didn't do well enough.

Plus it was meant to be in front of a panel of 3, but there was 4 people there in a tiny room and not even a glass of water to give me..

Kind of disappointed it didn't go as well as hoped, but not down and out yet till I hear back.

At least its good practice for future interviews

[JC-Mo'Fucka]

I conducted some interviews not too long ago and was amazed at the amount of people that were bloody good but were disregarded simply for not quite fitting in with the rest of the team.. Things like being a bit too nice even! It sounds silly but it was definitely vital. They're a mad thing interviews.

[Paul ™]

That doesn't surprise me.

The company I have went to work for is a massive company, and it's a managerial position but I reckon there will be plenty from within that company going for it too.

[RobertProsineckisLighter]

I conducted some interviews not too long ago and was amazed at the amount of people that were bloody good but were disregarded simply for not quite fitting in with the rest of the team.. Things like being a bit too nice even! It sounds silly but it was definitely vital. They're a mad thing interviews.